


Feathered

by AlloftheFandom



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Friendship, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Magic Users, Modern Fantasy, Not Humanstuck, Pesterlog(s) (Homestuck), Recovery, Referenced Past Relationships, Slow Burn, WIP, Wingfic, and dirkjake, background rosemary - Freeform, dave not understanding mental illness, kind of, magic with a ck, theres a lot of them, toxic headspaces
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-06
Updated: 2018-12-21
Packaged: 2019-07-04 09:21:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 29,144
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15838350
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AlloftheFandom/pseuds/AlloftheFandom
Summary: Dave was sick of going on excursions with Rose and Jade, as they tended to be menial and boring. But, the newest "adventure" on the girls' list is something that finally piques Dave's interest.He should've stayed home.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> **EDIT:** i decided against doing humanstuck cuz its a magickal setting and there can totally be aliens/mythical creatures

\-- tentacleTherapist [TT] began pestering turntechGodhead [TG] at 16:13 --

TT: Dave, are you about?

TT: I was wondering if you would be willing to come along with Jade and I on a little excursion.

TG: if its another excursion to hot topic or that weird witchy shop then count me the fuck out

TG: ive got like a million other things id rather do than watch you and jade ogle some bullshit crystals for two and a half hours

TG: again

TT: Don't pretend you don't like the shop. I know for a fact you've bought several fossils from there and you always have a good time when we go.

TG: yeah for like the first ten minutes

TG: but then you and jade just start going on and on about your witchy stuff and like whatever crystals make the best butt plugs

TG: and im left awkwardly standing behind yall with my bag waiting for you to wrap up your conversation

TG: im all shuffling my feet and checking my watch every minute or so

TG: making uncomfortable eye contact with the shopkeep every so often

TG: inching closer and closer to the door in the hopes that itll subliminally influence you to leave

TG: it never works

TG: why does it never work

TT: You never have to stay in the shop with us, you know.

TT: I'm sure if you asked Jade for the keys you could sit in her truck while we finish things up in the store.

TG: and overheat in the car like a dog?

TG: no thanks

TG: i think id rather just stand in the store and dick around on my phone til it dies

TT: Then why are you complaining? I offered you a solution and you declined.

TT: Or, could it be that you just enjoy having something to complain about?

TG: stfu

TG: as if youre not the same way

TT: Touché.

TT: Perhaps it's a result of our shared genetics.

TT: Or, more likely it's just in human nature to bitch about a situation at any given opportunity.

TG: youre right

TG: but you shouldnt say it

TG: anyways

TG: were you just trying to get me to come along with you and jade while you pop boners over crystals or was it something different for once

TG: cuz if its the former ive got a hot date with my bed for the next two hours and i really dont wanna miss out on that

TG: i cant leave her all alone like that

TG: shell get lonely without me

TT: I was unaware your mattress was a sentient woman who was capable of feeling separation anxiety.

TT: Does she have a name?

TG: answer the question rose

TT: Answer mine and I'll answer yours.

TG: i asked first

TG: and also like

TG: you initiated this conversation so im guessing you have better things to do than to ask about my mattress' life

TG: (her name is kate btw)

TT: Interesting.

TG: are you gonna answer the question or can i nap

TT: You're no fun.

TG: eat pant

TT: Anyways, I was wondering if you would want to come with Jade and I to explore this abandoned cottage in the woods?

TT: Jade said that Jake found it when he was out on one of his “Adventures” and he found some things in it that we may be interested in.

TT: You don't have to, obviously and I understand that you do have the prior commitment of spending time with Kate, but your company would be greatly appreciated.

TG: okay ngl that sounds kinda dope

TG: im in

TG: im sure kate can be without me for a little longer

TG: one question tho

TG: is john invited or is it just gonna be you jade and i

TT: I'm afraid John won't be able to join us today.

TT: I heard from Roxy that Jane told her that John caught an awful stomach bug and can't get out of bed, much less go out on a forest adventure.

TT: He's been asleep most of today.

TG: cant jane just fix him up with her weird healing magick?  


TG: just like swoosh her hands over him a little and say little spell

TT: That’s not exactly how her “Weird Healing Magick” works, Dave.

TT: While a magick user under the domain of Life may make an excellent healer for physical wounds, things like the common cold or the flu are very difficult to properly target and fix.

TT: If it were easy to do things like that, I’m sure most minor illnesses would be eradicated by now.

TT: So no, John won’t be joining us today.

TG: fuck that sucks

TG: and explains why he hasnt responded to the rap i sent him like three hours ago

TG: i hope my sick fires wont make his condition any worse

TT: I'm sure they'll improve his mood when he wakes up.

TG: theyd better

TG: ill still go tho

TG: afterwards i can tell him all about it and hell be so jelly

TT: I'm sure he will.

TT: I'll be downstairs in a minute and Jade says she's on her way so I would suggest getting ready.

TT: Bringing your sword might not be too bad of an idea either.

TG: ugh

TG: do i gotta

TT: You don't have to, but Jade says the foliage in the woods is pretty thick.

TG: ugh

TT: If it would be too troublesome for you, I'm sure we could find an alternative blade to take with us.

TT: Jade’s grandfather was an explorer and I’m sure he had at least one machete that we could bring.

TG: nah its fine

TG: ill bring it

TG: i just cant guarantee that the thing wont snap in half like the piece of shit it is on the first branch we encounter

TG: shitll be worse than a goddamn twig

TG: like its so fragile it cant even be qualified as a twig

TG: whatevers like 4 tiers down from a twig

TG: thats how pathetically itll snap

TG: snap like a rice krispie treat

TG: but without the crackle and pop

TG: a little disappointing but idk if you want your sword to crackle

TG: a crackling sword is a sure sign of shitty craftsmanship

TT: Dave.

TG: what

TT: Get ready.

TG: fuck sorry

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering tentacleTherapist [TT] at 16:33 --

Dave groaned and dropped his phone on his chest. He didn't want to go all the way up to his room to get his shoes and sword. He wanted to stay on the couch and not move for a few more minutes, but he had things to do and interesting things at that.

Dave heaved himself off the couch and up the stairs, hating himself just a little for agreeing to go along instead of napping. He knew he would regret not going if he napped, so he forced himself to wake up a little more as he put on his shoes and took his sword down off the wall.

It had been months since he'd last touched his sword. Since he and Dirk had moved in with the Lalondes, he hadn't had the constant obligation to use it. Not that he was complaining of course. He welcomed the new combat free life with open arms, glad to not have his ass beat into the ground on a daily basis. It was a bit difficult to adjust to at first, though.

He slung the sword onto his back and slipped on his beaten up converse. He couldn't help but feel a bit anxious with the sword on him, even if it was sheathed and he probably wasn't going to end up using it. He hated how he felt so anxious about having the sword on him, he felt dumb for feeling anything about the damn sword, really. It was just a sword, swords were cool and he liked them, it shouldn’t be that big of a deal. His emotions were so dumb sometimes. He shoved the feeling down and headed downstairs.

Rose was standing next to the door, when he got downstairs, scrolling through something on her phone.

"Jade's been outside for the past five minutes." Rose said, not bothering to look up from her phone.

"That's a fat load of shit, five minutes ago you weren't even downstairs." Dave shot back, opening the door.

"It's an exaggeration, Dave." Rose replied, putting her phone in her knit purse. "I was unaware you'd never heard of them. Would you like one of the pamphlets I made on figures of speech? I’m sure you would find it very educational.”

"Fuck off and get outside." Dave said, rolling his eyes. "We've apparently been keeping Jade waiting long enough."

Rose followed Dave out of the house, locking the door behind them. They walked down the unnecessarily long driveway to where Jade had parked along the street. Dave wasn't sure why she couldn't have just pulled into the driveway and saved him and Rose the minute or so walk to the street, but he wasn't one to question her on why she did the things she did. It was easier to just go with whatever it was she did than to ask her every time she did something weird.

Rose climbed into the passenger seat before he could even think to call shotgun. Whatever, he was cool with whatever was in the backseat this time. This week it was a haphazard pile of hunting rifles and a couple CD cases. Not the weirdest or the most concerning thing he'd piled seen in the back of her car. Dave dropped his sword onto the pile of guns, trying not to flinch at the loud clatter and shut the door behind him.

"Sorry about the clutter, Dave." Jade said, pulling out into the street and making an illegal U-turn. "I'm pretty sure I unloaded the guns before I put them back there, but I might be wrong."

"It's cool." Dave replied, slightly scooting away from the guns as if that would actually do anything to prevent getting shot in the case that one went off.  


Rose and Jade made quiet chitchat as she drove, leaving Dave to dick around on his phone. He figured he should probably let someone know what they were doing, because god knows Rose wouldn't.

\-- turntechGodehead [TG] began pestering timaeusTestified [TT] TG: hey dude rose and i are going over to jades for a bit so if you get home and no ones there dont worry we didnt get kidnapped

TG: just figured i should let you know

TT: Thank you for telling me, Dave. It's appreciated.

TT: Stay safe. If you need anything let me know and I'll be over there faster than a stallion at the start of the Kentucky Derby.

TT: Also, tell Jake I say hi and that I love him.

TG: cant you just message him

TT: I could, but I don't want to come on too strong.

TT: You know I'm not the best at being affectionate without making it at least a little... uncomfortable.

TG: dude

TG: hes your bf and he loves you

TG: just let your inhibitions chill for a sec and just send him a simple i love you or w/e

TG: its that easy

TT: But what if he's worried that I'm upset with him because I'm saying so little?

TG: dude chill

TG: its fine

TG: itll probably brighten his day to see it and he prolly wont even think twice about the length of the message

TG: you can at least try it and if shit heads south for some reason im sorry dude

TG: im sure you can work through it tho

TT: Can you just tell him?

TT: I'm not sure I want to risk it.

TG: jfc dirk

TG: its three words that youve said to him like a thousand times in person

TG: it being over text doesnt change shit

TG: stop pussying out

TT: Ugh, fine.

TT: I'll talk to you later, stay safe.

TG: ill try

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] has ceased pestering timaeusTestified [TT] at 16:50 --

Dave put his phone back down just in time for Jade to pull up to her house. Her house was a sprawling ranch home located on the outskirts of the other side of town that bordered a massive forest. He'd only been in the forest once to date, which he was fine with. He wasn't the biggest nature enthusiast. Even then, he'd only been on the very edges of it, not going far enough to lose sight of Jade's house.

"Hey Dave, could you hand me my rifle?" Jade asked, turning back to him.

"Which one?" Dave responded, gently pushing around some of the guns on the pile.

"The one with the flower stickers on the butt. No, no, the other one." Jade said, trying to point to the one she was talking about. Dave found it and handed it to her and grabbed his own weapon before getting out of the car.

"I already told Jake where we were going so unless you need to go pee or something, we're good to head out." Jade said, slinging her rifle onto her back.  
"Uh no, I think I'm good." Dave replied, putting his hands in his pockets.

"I am as well." Rose said. "It's probably best we head out now before it starts getting dark."

"Alrighty then!" Jade cheered. "It's pretty much a straight shot from my house to the cottage so the walk shouldn't be too bad. You guys should still stick close to me, though. The woods have this weird way of getting people who aren't used to them super lost even if you head in one direction."

Jade led them through the woods, following a trail of colorful bands that were tied around specific trees. The late September air had a slowly sharpening chill to it which made Dave glad he had dressed warmer than his other two companions. It astounded him that Jade could be marching around in a t-shirt and shorts and not seem to even notice the chill in the air.

\---

They had been walking for what felt like hours when they finally reached the cottage. It was a squat little building made from crumbling old stone with rotting wooden framing around what might’ve been windows at some point. The door appeared to be barely holding onto the hinges of the frame, as if the next stiff wind would knock it to the ground. Dave couldn't help but wonder how long it had been there, it seemed as if it had been around for well over 1000 years old with how much it the environment had overtaken the structure. He figured he was wrong and that his thoughts on it were a gross miscalculation. Realistically it was probably only 100 or so years old, but something about it just exuded age.

"Well, what are we waiting for?" Jade asked, breaking the eerie silence that had fallen over their small party.

She marched straight into the cottage with a spring in her step, Rose right on her heels. Dave stayed back for a moment, unsure if he actually wanted to go in. A small voice inside him told him to turn tail and run, as if something awful was about to befall them. He pushed it down and ignored it, figuring it was just another dumb bout of his "anxiety disorder" that Rose claimed he had. And so, he followed the girls into the cottage.

The inside was only slightly less dilapidated than the exterior. The only furniture in the cottage was a broken wooden table and a well-stocked bookshelf that had collapsed into a heap in the corner. Rose and Jade had gathered around the bookshelf, sorting through the surprisingly mostly intact books.

Dave wandered around the cottage, letting the girls talk amongst themselves about the strange pile of books. He checked his phone out of boredom and found that he had no reception. He wasn't fully sure why he bothered checking. He was in the middle of the woods, it's not like there was going to be a cell tower anywhere nearby.

"Dave, could you come over here for a second?" Rose called, turning to him.

"Sure." Dave replied, walking back over to where the girls were. "What do you need?"

"Could you hold some of these books for me?" Rose asked, handing him a small pile of books before he could respond. "My bag can't fit all of the books I want to take and you look like you need something to occupy yourself with before you accidentally break something."

"There's nothing in here to break, though." Dave pointed out. "Everything in here's already broken. Like what do you think I'm gonna do? Lean against the wall and make the whole building collapse. I wouldn't even have to lean on it! If I so much as looked at it the wrong way it would probably collapse. Shit's weaker than Kanye's raps."

Rose ignored his rambling and continued adding books to the stack in Dave's arms. He looked down at the books, hoping to glean what the books were on from the titles, but there were no titles. Just plain, worn covers that were in too good of condition for their location.

“What’s in these books that’s got you so interested?” Dave asked, trying to flip the cover off the top one with his nose.

“Old magick, Alchemy, forgotten beings too horrible to name.” Rose explained, setting another book down on the pile.

“So more of the same shit that you already have at home.”

“Not really. It’s true that I do have a lot of texts that pertain to similar things, but all of them are modern. Finding books on Alchemy and dark summonings is difficult these days because of these pesky things called laws that prevent such things from being public knowledge.”

"Don't you think it's a little weird these books are in as good of condition as they are?" Dave asked, voicing his thoughts.

"Most of the salvageable books are either under the remains of the bookshelf or under a pile of other books." Rose replied, putting another book on the pile in Dave's arms. "A good amount of the books are ruined, but there's still quite a few that are at the very least legible and therefore worth taking."

"Cool. So is there anything no-" Dave was cut off as a loud bang came from the opposite corner of the room.

All three of them whirled around to face whatever had made the sound. A trapdoor that Dave hadn't noticed until then had been thrown open with enough force to crack the wood it was made of. He dropped the books and pulled out his sword, earning a glare from Rose.

A large Alternian woman ascended from below the floor, her massive mane of hair and long horns making her look more imposing than she already did. A large, golden trident was gripped in one of her clawed hands, the points of which were coated in a layer of fresh red blood. A tyrian aura surrounded her, bathing the room in a harsh pink glow signifying her status on top of the Haemospectrum. She looked beyond livid at finding them in her rundown cottage and going through her shit. He understood why she was pissed, but he didn't think it warranted getting straight up violent on their asses. Couldn’t she just put up one of those “We don’t call the cops here” signs up as a warning instead of ambushing innocent trespassers?

“ _Ahh ymg' ah ph'nglui ya wgah'nagl?_ ” The witch hissed in a language Dave was pretty sure wasn’t an actual language.

Rose was the first to move, drawing her knitting needles from her bag and rushing at the apparent witch. A cruel, sharp-toothed smile crept onto the Witch's face as Rose advanced on her, almost as if she was amused at the very notion of someone attempting to attack her. She lifted her free hand up as Rose lunged at her, and froze his sister in midair before slamming her into the wall of the cottage. She fell to the ground, body completely limp, as if she were a ragdoll. Damn, okay.

The witch returned her wicked gaze to Dave and Jade and started towards them, trident aimed directly at Dave's chest. Well, time for the years of battle training to finally pay off, he supposed.

Dave waited until she was about a foot away from him, before quickly sidestepping around her and attempting to stab her between the ribs from behind. She blocked his attack, turning on her heel almost faster than he could register. She thrust her trident at his chest which he blocked, shoving his sword between the prongs of the weapon. Dave pushed against her trident, forcing it upwards and struggling to hold it there for more than a moment.

Jade shot the Witch twice in the back while Dave had her attention. That however, didn't seem to hurt her as much as it did piss her off.

The Witch wrenched her trident downward, snapping Dave's sword in the process and knocking him on his ass. She turned back toward Jade who fired another shot at her chest which the Witch froze an inch away from her chest before letting it out of her magick’s grasp and letting it fall to the ground like a stone.

Dave got back on his feet and went in for another stab at her back as Jade fired another two shots at the Witch's head. She froze the two bullets just as Dave managed to stab her through her massive mane of hair. Dave swiftly pulled his blade out, and backed away from the Witch before she could spin around and try to stab him again. He wasn't willing to risk that again, especially with a broken blade.

The Witch lowered her trident from where she had it pointed at Jade's throat and she slowly turned back to Dave. She raised her free hand once again, lifting both Dave and Jade off the ground. Dave struggled with all his strength to move, but whatever magickal bullshit thing she was doing had rendered him immobile.

The Witch cackled, throwing them both against the walls with what felt like the force of a freight train. Dave hit the wall and felt at least one of his ribs snap, before he fell to the floor in a heap. He forced himself back to his feet, not ready to give up yet. Never let it be said that he wasn’t too persistent for his own good.

" _Ahh ymg' ah mgephai yogor?_ " The Witch said in the same incomprehensible language. She sounded pissed and confused.

Dave swung his still bloodied blade at her which she caught between the prongs of her trident and flipped it out of his grasp. He dove after his sword and turned back toward her, still on the ground. He brought his sword up, guarding his chest in case she went to stab at him again and he couldn’t roll out of the way.

She pointed her trident at his throat, a terrible grin on her painted lips.

" _Ymg' ah ah'legeth if ymg' ahlloig ymg' ahor vulgtmnahog ya llll ymg' mnahn' ah'n'ghaor._ " She said as if he could understand her.

She raised her hand one final time and snapped her fingers. “Fhtagn.”

An excruciating pain shot through Dave's back before he slumped to the ground and blacked out.


	2. Chapter 2

Dave woke up confused and face down on his bed. His entire body was sore, but his back ached with a severity that reminded him of the time his Bro threw him down three flights of stairs and his ribs hurt like a motherfucker. He was tempted to say the pain was worse, but his memory of that time was kind of hazy. He refused to open his eyes, he just wanted to go back to sleep and ride the pain out. Besides, it was still dark out, it's not like he needed to be up yet.

He turned onto his side, trying to get more comfortable, but something aside from the immense amount of pain was making his back feel odd. It felt as if something large was attached to his back and wouldn't stop bumping against the wall no matter how he shifted.

Giving in, Dave opened his eyes to curiously peer at his back. A large pair of black wings had sprouted from either side of his spine. Huh, those weren’t normally there. No, that couldn't be right, he had to be hallucinating, right? He blinked. They were still there. He blinked again. They remained. What the fuck happened to him?

His memory was slowly coming back to him and it slowly dawned on him what must have happened. It had to be something the Witch did, where else would they have come from? He knew going into the cottage was a bad idea.

Cautiously, Dave attempted to extend one of his newfound wings which to his mild surprise, worked. The tips of his feathers brushed the long string of lights he had hanging from his ceiling, causing them to wobble disconcertingly. He retracted his wing, a little hesitant to fully stretch his wings out in his cluttered room and risk breaking any of his shit. He'd paid good money for his worldly possessions and he wasn't about to ruin it by flailing his wings around like a brain-dead idiot.

"Hey Daaaave?!" Roxy called to him from somewhere down the hall.

Shit, Roxy was home? How the fuck was he going to explain what was going on when he barely had a clue as to what was going on himself. If he was being honest with himself, Roxy would probably know more about the situation than he did on account of her and her girlfriend's vast knowledge on the mystical arts. Also, it's not like he could hide from her forever, seeing as she lived with him and was constantly popping into his room.

"Dave? I need your help with something, it’s really important I-" Roxy called again, this time poking her head in through the door. Her words stopped mid-sentence as she gaped at the new additions to his body. "Holy shit balls, Batman, where the fuck did you get those?"

Dave jumped a little in surprise, not expecting her to come into his room so soon. He accidentally bumped one of his wings against a shelf and knocked down several expensive vintage records. They’d probably be fine.

"Uh, I dunno." Dave replied, gingerly trying to fold his wings against his back. "I think Rose, Jade and I ended up fighting some skanky ass forest Witch and she might've done this to me, but it's kinda hazy. Like, something else might’ve happened, but I can’t really say. I’ll get back to you about it if I remember more. "

"Holy fuck, you really fought a Witch?" Roxy asked, awestruck. "You totally have to tell me all about it if you remember, but first you've gotta help me move Rose before she fuckin' dies."

"Shit, fuck, is Rose okay?" Dave asked, standing up, almost overbalancing from the new weight on his back. "I didn't think she got thrown into the wall that hard."  
"She got what?" Roxy yelled, her excitedness visbly draining and turning into barely contained fury. "Hoo boy, I'm gonna find this bitch and when I do, ooooh she's gonna be sorry she even fucked with you guys."

"Roxy, is Rose okay?" Dave asked again, crossing the room to her.

"I mean she is for now, but tbh I'm not sure how much longer she's gonna be okay for." Roxy shrugged.

"What happened to Rose?" Dave asked, growing impatient and more concerned with the longer Roxy wasn't telling him.

"You've gotta see it, Dave. It's pretty fuckin’ bad..." Roxy trailed off, looking back out into the hallway.

Roxy suddenly grabbed Dave's hand, finally making him notice how his hands had changed into dangerous looking talons. All of his fingers remained, but his skin up to his elbow was scaly and black. He had no idea how he hadn't noticed it, seeing as how glaringly obvious the change was. He decided to blame it on the dark room.

Roxy dragged him down the hall to Rose's room and pushed her door open. Rose was lying on the ground next to her bed pouring a bottle of water on what appeared to be a blanket covering her legs. It took a moment for Dave to realize that it wasn't a blanket on her legs, as her legs were now gone. In their stead was a set of tentacles that nearly blended in with the inky black carpet.

"You're back." Rose said, sounding annoyed. "It certainly took you long enough. I'm surprised I didn't faint or die from dehydration while you were shooting the shit with Dave."

"Geez Rosie, I'm sorry for taking like a minute to get Dave and check up on him." Roxy replied, unfazed by the venom in her sister's tone.

"Could you please just help me get to the pool?" Rose asked, exasperated. "I would prefer not to die in such a pitiful way if possible."

"Yeah, yeah, we know, not enough fiery explosions and dark tentacle gods or whatever." Roxy replied, rolling her eyes.

Roxy stared at Rose for a moment, biting her lip and squinting with her head tilted slightly to the side. Her classic thinking face.

"Well?" Dave prompted after Roxy had been silent for well over a minute.

"I'm just trying to puzzle out how the fuck we're gonna get her downstairs." Roxy said, chewing on her lip slightly. "Cuz' like, no offense Rosie, but idk if Dave and I can lift you and like eight tentacles and carry you downstairs without some sort of incident taking place. Maybe we could- Hmm...." Roxy paused for a moment, lost in thought. "Rosie, how much can you move?"

"I'm not completely sure." Rose confessed. "I'm sure I can move these damned things, but I don't think I can do much more than scoot around and support my weight with them."

"That's better than nothing." Roxy said, cheerily. "I think I know how we can get you down there without accidentally dropping you down a flight of stairs. Dave get on her left."

"Okay, but how?" Dave asked, staring at the spread out mass of tentacles covering a good portion of the floor around his sister. "I don't think I can even get within three feet of her without stepping on at least one tentacle."

"Rosie can you-"

"Yes Roxy, I can get them out of the way." Rose interrupted, drawing her tentacles in as far as she could get them. She shifted her upper body forward, catching herself on her arms, and maneuvering her lower body so that it was behind her. "Is this better?"

"Much."

Dave and Roxy got on either side of their sister, carefully lifting her off the ground. Dave took care as to not dig his sharp set of talons into her skin. They dragged her out of her room, trying not to let her trailing tentacles knock into anything and break any of her haphazardly scattered trinkets. Dave knew Rose wouldn't take to kindly to finding out that he and Roxy had broken another important magical artifact, no matter how accidental it had been.

Rose was doing little to actually support her weight, which Dave couldn’t particularly blame her for. After all, tentacles weren’t really meant for land transportation.

They managed to get Rose down the stairs without any serious incident. Though, Dave narrowly avoided dropping her partway down the stairs when he misplaced his foot a step down from where Roxy was stepping. Rose clawed at the back of his neck, trying to not lose her grip on him as Roxy quickly stepped down and rebalanced their sister.

They managed to get Rose out the door and into the pool without any more trouble. She gracefully dove into the pool, hitting the other two with a large splash that easily soaked through their clothes. Dave couldn't help but feel like she did it on purpose.

Dave shook himself off a little, uncomfortable at with how his shirt was clinging to him. His wings instinctively flared out, sending more droplets flying and causing pain to shoot through his back and ribs. Fuck, lifting his sister probably wasn't the best for his injuries.

A concerning thought occurred to Dave as he watched his sister lie down on the bottom of the pool. "Hey Roxy, isn't it dangerous for most aquatic life to be in chlorinated water?"

"Oh fuck, you’re right!" Roxy exclaimed, turning and running back into the house without another word.

"Roxy!" Dave called after her, despite knowing his attempts would be fruitless. It didn't look like Rose was dying or suffering, it just looked like she was peacefully floating at the bottom. Maybe he was wrong? Well that, or she died instantly.

Roxy ran back through the back door, a small tome in one hand. She flipped to one of the first pages and sat down with her legs crossed.

She dipped a hand into the water, swirling it around for a second. " _Emundabit_." She muttered, closing her eyes.

A small ripple traveled across the surface of the water, followed by a soft pink glow that was a hallmark of her magick. At least he was pretty sure it was. He didn’t watch Roxy practice magick all that often if he was being honest.  
The glow seeped into the water, staining it a vivid pink for a moment before the color snapped back into her hand like a rubber band. She withdrew her hand from the pool and shook off the droplets.

"Did it work?" Dave asked, hesitantly. He was never really sure if Roxy's spells worked since they seemed to only function as intended half the time. The other half of the time she would end up accidentally creating these odd green cubes with slightly beveled edges no matter what form of spell she was trying to cast. She claimed it was only her Aspect spells that did it, but he wasn’t sure how much he trusted that. If some of her magick fucked up, why wouldn’t all of it.

"It should’ve." Roxy replied, turning back towards him. "The water doesn’t look any different, but I’m guessing that’s probably a good thing. We could ask Rose and see if she noticed any difference."

Roxy splashed the water towards where Rose was laying. Rose opened one eye and looked up at them. Roxy motioned to her to come up, but Rose shook her head and mouthed something Dave didn't catch. He'd never been all that good at reading lips.

"Alrighty then." Roxy said with a huff. "Since she's not coming up for a bit do you wanna change out of your wet clothes? Or? Or! I could use my magicks and get the water out of your clothes!"

"Fuck uh, I appreciate the offer, but I'm cool with just changing like normal. And it’s pretty much just my shirt, so I don’t think it’s a big enough deal to warrant a whole spell." Dave replied, pulling his wet shirt so it detached from his chest. It reaffixed itself to his body as soon as he let go.

"Are you sure, hun?" Roxy asked. "Cuz' like unless you were cutting up your shirts in your room before I came in, I think that's your only shirt with holes for your wings."

"I can cut holes into another shirt, or at least figure out how the fuck I'm gonna get out of this one. And besides, I need to put something on my ribs, 'cause I'm pretty sure at least one of them got broken when we fought that Witch. She was like, telekinetic I think? I dunno if that’s the right term, but she had a great fuckin’ time throwing us into walls." Dave answered.

"Whaaaat? Oh hun, why didn’t you say anything earlier?" Roxy pried, getting back to her feet. "Are you okay? Well I mean you're probably not since your ribs might be broken."

"I'm fine." Dave replied, forcing his tone to be nonchalant so Roxy wouldn't worry more than she already was. He could take care of himself just fine. He didn't need Roxy worrying over him like Dirk did.

"What a cunt!" Roxy fumed, still pissed off about the Witch. "Ugh, I'm gonna fucking destroy her, mark my fucking words, Dave. I'm gonna kick her sorry little ass so hard she's gonna end up in a whole nother year."

"Or you could like, banish her to the shadow realm." Dave suggested. "Is that something you can do? I don't really get how your whole voidy thing works, but like that seems like something that you should be able to do. If you can't I'll be hella disappointed and I'm gonna sue whatever person it was that discovered magick. The poor bastard won't even know what hit him. Like we're gonna drag this motherfucker out of the grave and resurrect his boney ass just to get legal on him. I'm gonna grave rob this dude, but like in court."

"Hell yeah! Do it! Can I be your lawyer?" Roxy asked.

"Fuck yes you can be my lawyer. I couldn't think of anyone better suited to do that." Dave high fived his sister. A jolt of pain went through his ribs. Having broken bones was such bullshit.

"Mmkay, but seriously, you should probably go ice your ribs before Dirk gets home and skins my ass for not making you take care of your injuries. I'm also gonna message him and let him know what's going on so he doesn't totally lose his mind when he gets home. I'll message you if Rose surfaces and wants to talk." Roxy patted him gently on one of his wings, making him jump a little in surprise at the foreign feeling.

Dave headed back inside, not particularly eager to put ice on his ribs while his clothes were still damp. He trudged up to his room, hating how every stair seemed to make his back ache more. God, why did his wings have to be so heavy? Couldn't the magick that caused them be decent enough to not cause him constant pain? Stupid fucking magick...

Dave unbuttoned his shirt, thankful that he'd worn his flannel instead of a regular t-shirt. He spread his wings slightly, hoping that it would make it at least a little easier to get his shirt off. He twisted to the side, ignoring the sharp twinge of pain from his ribs, and pushed his shirt as far as it would go down his wing. He turned around and repeated the action on the other wing, shuddering at the odd sensation of the fabric pushing his feathers around.

With some uncomfortable twisting and pulling, he managed to get his shirt off without ripping it any further than it already was. Cool, now he got to mutilate another one of his shirts if he didn't want to freeze his nipples off.

Dave got up and draped his damp shirt over his desk chair to dry. He made a mental note to throw it in the hamper when it dried, but he was pretty sure he would forget by the time he got around to doing his laundry. If anything, he'd probably end up wearing it again before he did laundry next so he wouldn't have to cut up more of his shirts.

He went over his closet, nearly tripping on the hilt of his broken sword on his way. That was strange; he didn't remember leaving his sword there. In fact, now that he really put thought to it, he didn't even know how he got home after the Witch knocked him out. Maybe Jade had taken Rose and him home? No, if she had done that she would've had the decency to drop Rose in the pool. Maybe the Witch had teleported them somehow? But how would she have known where to send them to?

"Ugh, whatever." Dave mumbled to himself, digging through his closet for a shirt he didn't really care about cutting up. He didn't really care enough to spend too long worrying about how he'd gotten home, seeing as he was home now and not dead in the middle of the woods. He figured there were more pressing matters to worry about, such as the wings that were attached to his back or his throbbing ribs.

In all honesty, the wings didn't bother him that much. Yeah, they were hurting his back and he could probably not leave the house until they got the situation sorted out, but that wasn't too big of a deal for him. It at least meant he got a break from the hell that was the public school system if they weren't able to get rid of his wings by Monday morning. He’d miss his friends, but he could still easily talk to them through the internet.

Dave found a crumpled plain shirt at the bottom of the pile and dragged it out, sending several articles of clothing at the top of the pile to tumble further into his closet. He retrieved his broken sword from where he'd accidentally kicked it under a table and cut two slits into the back a few inches below the neckline. He held the shirt up in front of him, checking to see if the slits were approximately long enough to fit his wings at their widest point. They seemed long enough, so he flattened his wings against his back as much as he could and slipped the shirt on over his head. With a little guiding, he managed to slip his wings through the slits without tearing them too much further.

Dave got up and grabbed his phone off his bedside table before heading back downstairs to get an ice pack for his ribs. He checked his side as he walked into the kitchen, wholly unsurprised at the amount of bruising there was. It wasn't the worst bruising he'd seen on himself, but it certainly made the top ten. He’d probably put it around number eight.

Dave gently pressed the ice to his side, hissing in pain and relief through his teeth, and sat down on the couch. He spread his wings out so he could lean back against the couch and opened his phone.

He figured it would probably be a good idea to message Jade and see if she was awake yet and if she was in the same boat the he and Rose were in.  


\-- turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering gardenGnostic [GG] at 19:40 --

TG: hey jade

TG: are you up yet

TG: and if you are what the fuck happened to you cuz like holy shit

Dave waited a minute or so, but got no response from Jade. He did however, finally get a message from John.

\-- ectoBiologist [EB] began pestering turntechGodhead [TG] at 19:42 --

EB: hey dave! sorry for not responding sooner.

EB: i caught a really nasty cold, so i've been asleep pretty much all day.

EB: what have you been up to?

TG: rose and jade managed to convince me to go with them on another one of their magicky outings  


TG: and uh  


TG: we kind of ended up fighting a witch???  


EB: what????  


EB: no way!  


TG: nah dude it gets crazier  


TG: so like here we are wandering through the woods like hansel and fucking gretel  


TG: and we get to this cottage that jake had told jade about  


TG: and no  


TG: it wasnt candy  


EB: boo.  


TG: ikr  


TG: okay but this cottage looked older than christopher walkens crusty ballsack  


TG: but twice as dilapidated  


TG: tbh this cottage makes his sack look like a brand new car  


TG: thats how fucking ancient that shit was  


TG: anyways so we went in and rose and jade immediately started looting the damn place  


TG: and im just hanging back cuz my spidey senses are tingling the absolute fuck out  


TG: then this witch comes up from this trapdoor and starts throwing us around with her magicks  


TG: like shit dude  


TG: she threw us around like a couple of lawn chairs in a category 5 hurricane  


TG: tbh im a little surprised that rose seems just fine  


TG: especially since she got slammed into the wall and was out like a fucking light before she hit the ground  


TG: ig her bones are a little more durable than mine  


TG: shes been taking sips of that bone strengthening juice and she hasnt been telling me  


TG: anyways  


TG: so like jade and i were fighting this witch like the couple badasses we are and then she started throwing us into walls  


TG: and then i woke up at home with these massive wings coming out of my back  


TG: and my hands look like a couple of burnt chicken tenders that some underpaid fast food employee lost in the fryer a month ago  


TG: shits crispy as hell  


TG: no ones eating those puppies  


TG: better put those into the trash where they belong  


TG: its kind of annoying tbh  


TG: these dumb claws keep tapping against my phone whenever i type  


EB: claws????  


TG: yeah man  


TG: thats whats up with my hands now  


TG: ive got weird bird hands  


TG: oh also  


TG: rose is like an octopus mermaid now so thats a thing  


TG: something might be up with jade but i havent heard back from her yet  


TG: i bet shes some kind of furry now  


TG: i mean ig were all furries now but her especially  


TG: way to follow your dreams  


TG: im so proud of her  


TG: so thats how my day went  


EB: nice try dave, but you're gonna have to try a little harder than that if you want to prank me!  


TG: what  


TG: dude no  


TG: im not pranking you  


TG: why do you never believe me about this shit  


TG: is this because of ricky rat  


TG: jfc i trick you once and now youll never believe me about anything more extravagant than making a sandwich  


TG: do i need to send you pics or something  


TG: will you believe me then  


EB: maybe.  


TG: alright hold on a sec

Dave opened the camera app on his phone and struggled to take a picture. The button was already finicky enough without his claws, but now it was nearly impossible. He managed to get a decent picture and he sent it to John.

TG: read it and weep dude  


TG: or like look at it  


TG: w/e you get what i meant  


EB: holy shit! can you actually fly with those?  


TG: i have no fuckin idea  


TG: i havent tried yet or really had the time to  


TG: im gonna tho  


TG: just wait and see  


TG: im gonna soar like a majestic fucking eagle  


TG: who rules the skies now bitch  


TG: well that is if we dont get this sorted out  


TG: im still waiting for rose to wake up from her pool nap  


EB: why is she in the pool?  


TG: shes a mermaid  


TG: did you not read what i sent you  


EB: i skimmed it.  


TG: ugh  


EB: gee sorry.  


EB: you talk a lot and reading everything you say takes awhile.  


TG: learn to read faster  


EB: learn to talk less.  


TG: no fuck you  


EB: fuck you!  


TG: nah  


EB: you said it first.  


TG: you replied  


EB: fuck off.  


TG: okay fine  


TG: i can see when im not wanted  


TG: ill let you know if i figure out the flying situation  


EB: dave, wait!  


TG: what  


EB: if you really do try to fly, please film it and send it to me.  


EB: i want to see you fall on your ass.  


TG: thats so rude  


TG: and yeah of course i will  


TG: what kind of friend would i be if i didnt  


TG: a pretty piss poor one im sure  


EB: okay, im gonna go back to sleep now since i'm still really tired.  


EB: i'll message you when i wake up.  


TG: okay gnight dude  


TG: sweet dreams  


TG: dont let the bed bugs bite  


\-- ectoBiologist [EB] ceased pestering turntechGodhead [TG] at 20:12 --

Dave dropped his phone on his chest and relaxed back into the couch. His entire torso hurt, but at least the ice was doing a bit to numb his side. He figured he should probably get up and take something for his pain, but moving from where he was reclining proved to be more difficult than he anticipated. He decided to just wait until he absolutely had to get up to take some meds so he wouldn't have to go through the whole process of sitting down again.

He sat there for a minute, lightly dozing until his phone buzzed again. He checked it, curious to see if Jade had finally responded and was a little surprised to see it was Roxy instead.

\-- tipsyGnostalgic [TG] began pestering turntechGodhead [TG] at 20:18 --

TG: rose is up and ready to talk

TG: come out here whenever

TG: <3

TG: okay give me a sec

TG: take your time hun

\-- tipsyGnostalgic [TG] ceased pestering turntechGodhead [TG] at 20:22 --

Dave lethargically dragged himself off the couch and into the bathroom to take some of whatever pain meds happened to be in the cupboard. He dug through the disorganized bottles, hoping to find one with a label that he recognized.

After some digging, he found a small bottle of some type of painkiller he didn't recognize, but it claimed to be extra strength so he figured that was his best bet. He took the cap off of a mouthwash bottle and filled it with water and drank them down, making a face at the gross taste. Bathroom sink water with a hint of pills and mint was not a good combination of the palette.

He slipped out of the bathroom and out into the backyard where Rose was sitting on the steps of the pool. Roxy was kicking her feet in the water and chatting idly with Rose.

"I see you've finally decided to join us." Rose commented, turning towards him. Dave flipped her off in response and sat down next to the pool.

"Do you know what the fuck's going on?" Dave asked. "'Cause I'm pretty in the dark about this whole thing and an explanation would be dope."

"Well, I'm assuming thst Witch did this to us." Rose stated.

"Yeah, no shit, Sherlock. What specifically did she do?" Dave shot back.

"It’s hard for me to say since I was out for most of it, but my best guess is she was an extraordinarily powerful Witch who was well versed in her aspect, judging by how she was able to manipulate a such large amount of our forms. It also seemed that she was rather high up on the Haemospectrum, my best guess being that were we on the Alternian homeworld she very well could’ve been the ruler. It would also explain her telekinetic abilities if she was." Rose explained. "Due to the nature of the changes she was able to perform on us, I would guess her aspect would be Life and on the more active end of the spectrum as far as users go."

"Okay cool, I understood like half of that." Dave nodded. "So can you change us back?"

"No, of course not." Rose replied, affronted. "My aspect is Light, not Life. I couldn't even attempt to perform spells like the one's she used on us without having them blow up in my face. I would suggest going to Jane about this, but she leans more toward the passive end of the scale so her abilities are practically useless as well. The only way I can see this being remedied is through confrontation with the Witch again and either getting her to change is back, or killing her to break the spell. Or, we could find someone who could "heal" us and get us changed back to our normal selves, but the chances of finding someone who knows how to perform such magick is slim to none. I personally would like to go back and fight her, seeing as she never gave me the chance to fight back."

"So what I'm getting from this is: we're gonna have to go back and fight this bitch if we wanna get turned back." Dave said.

"Precisely."

"Okay, count me the fuck out then. I'm not really eager to go back out there and get my ass handed to me again."

"Dave, I understand that your pride is fragile, but if you don't want to be stuck with those wings for the rest of your life, it's the only way." Rose pointed out.

"I dunno, these wings are pretty bitchin' and I wouldn't be too opposed to having them til I die."

"Dave please consider other people's lives for a moment." Rose said. "If we don't I'll be permanently affixed to this pool and God knows what's happened to Jade. As much as I do enjoy the drama of my new look, I would rather not be stuck like this forever."

"Okay, but how are you going to get out there?" Dave asked. "If you think I'm about to carry your heavy ass into the middle of the forest so you can fight a Witch you're dead fucking wrong, dude."

"I'm not going to make you carry me." Rose answered, rolling her eyes. "My idea was more along the lines of a mobile tank."  
"How the fuck are you going to get that? Are you gonna mount a big ass fish tank on a little red wagon like some dumbass five year old who thinks he can take his fish for a walk? Or is it more of a Fish Plays Pokémon kind of thing? Y’know, a dance pad from DDR kind of thing."

"The former, obviously. How could you be so foolish to assume that we would need fancy electronics to get me around when we could use a small child for manual labor. Your lack of critical thinking skills astounds me sometimes." Rose replied, sarcasm dripping from her tone.

"You're right, I'm sorry. I'll go by the local elementary school and steal a kid just so you can be mobile again."

"Your kindness is appreciated." Rose said, putting a hand over her heart. "I shall never forget this act of kindness."

"Seriously though, where the fuck would you get a tank like that?" Dave inquired.

"I'm sure Dirk would have no problem making one for me." Rose answered. "It's been a while since he's had a real project to work on, so I'm sure he'll be glad to have something to do."

"I mean you're probably right." Dave responded.

"What do you mean probably? Of course I'm right."

"Damn, someone forgot to take their humble pills this morning." Dave commented. Rose raised one tentacle out of the water in a silent threat to splash him. "Okay, god, sorry. Don't fucking splash me, I've only got so many shirts I'm okay with mutilating." Rose lowered her tentacle back into the water as the conversation lulled into nothingness.

Dave kicked at a stray pebble on the ground, unsure of what to say if he should even say anything. He really didn't want to have to fight the Witch again, but he knew there was no way in hell they would be able to talk reason into her. He understood he needed to do it for Rose's sake and also probably for his back's sake.

"Dave?" Rose asked, drawing him out of his thoughts. "I was thinking just a moment ago,"

"Wow, really? I didn't know you could do that." Dave interrupted. Rose glared at him.

"I was thinking," Rose continued. "Before we attempt to take the Witch on again we should hone our magickal abilities so we could actually stand a chance against her. Or in your case, you would have to learn."

"Fuck, do I have to? I'm pretty damn good with a sword and I'm positive if she hadn't gone telekinetic on my ass I would've taken her down. I don't need magick to take her on, but if you want to, go right ahead." Dave didn't really care for using magick himself, as Bro had drilled it into him from a young age that using magick to settle a fight was cowardly and that pretty much all magick was useless nonsense people used as an excuse to make themselves look better.

"Oh come on, Dave!" Roxy whined melodramatically, finally inserting herself into the conversation. "Magick could totally help you out if you fought her and depending on what your aspect is, it could maybe even make it useless. Or, you could just learn it for fun like Rose and I did! Magick is so versatile, I know you’d like it."

"Nah, I think I'm good." Dave said, dismissively. "I've got hella swordplay skills and I don't need magick to help me win a fight."

"Oh please, Dave." Roxy begged. "You don't even have to use it in a fight if you don't want to, just please let us teach you magick. It could be fun!"

"Nah." Dave replied.

"Please!"

"No."

"Dave, I second what Roxy's saying." Rose interjected. "Magick could prove very beneficial not only in a fight, but also in your day to day life."

"No."

"Dave, you're acting like a child." Rose huffed. "We aren't going to force you to do this, but a proper declination would be appreciated."

"No."

"Now you're just being an asshole."

"Nah."

"At least give it some thought." Rose said, vexed at her brother's childish refusal.

"Ugh, fine." Dave replied, caving. "Give me some time, okay? Like I know it's kinda dumb, but I just need some time to kind of mull this over, y'know? Put some wood on that fire and see how it burns. I'll let you know how I feel about it in the morning."

"Alright." Rose responded, just the slightest bit smug.


	3. Chapter 3

Dave was awoken from his restless sleep by a knock on his door. Who was knocking at his door? Judging by the way the light was coming through the window, it couldn't be later than seven which was way earlier than he usually got up. Who the fuck couldn't wait until a more decent hour to talk?

"Yeah?" Dave grumbled, annoyed. His door was quietly pushed open and his older brother stepped into the room.

"Hey dude." Dirk greeted. "Roxy told me what happened yesterday. How are you holding up."

Dave gave him a thumbs up and buried his face back into the pillow.

"That bad, huh?"

"I'm fine." Dave said, muffled by the pillow. "Just really fucking tired and in a decent amount of pain, but otherwise I'm good."

"Uh sorry, dude." Dirk responded, sheepishly. "I just wanted to check up on your ass before I left for school. Make sure you weren’t dying or anything."

"I appreciate the sentiment, but why couldn't you just have messaged me so I could respond when I was actually concious?"

"I wanted ask you something in person because I feel like messaging it to you could lead to miscommunication and you thinking I'm mad at you when I'm not. Conveying emotions correctly over text and not coming off like a callous douchebag is hard. Also, I care about you and I wanted to make sure you didn't die in your sleep last night."

"What's up?" Dave asked, face still in the pillow.

"Dude you need to get your face out of the pillow, I can barely hear you."

"Muhhhhhhhhhh..." Dave whined, dragging his face out of the pillow. "What's your question?"

"Why didn't you message me when shit went down with the Witch? I would've come out there to help you out, y'know?"

"We were fuckdeep in the woods, there wasn't any service, dude. What, you think that some cell company’s just gonna send a team into the woods so the birds can get service? Fuck no, birds don’t have rights."

"Right. Fuck, yeah that makes sense." Dirk responded, putting the heel of his palm against his forehead. "Don't mind me, just being a legendary idiot over here."

"Dude it's fine, it's early. You don’t have to be at the top of your game right now."

"Ugh, yeah..." Dirk trailed off, pinching the bridge of his nose. He looked stressed, but then again he always did. Dave wondered if he was working himself too hard again. "Still though, I don't know how I didn't think of that."

"Dude chill, it's fine. I fucking checked my phone in the middle of the woods which is probably dumber, tbh."

"Fuck, probably, haha." Dirk replied, sounding wholly unconvinced. "So uh, do you need anything before I head out?" He asked, quickly changing the subject.

"Not that I can think of." Dave responded honestly.

"Are you sure?" Dirk asked. "I could get you pain meds or something. A glass of water maybe?"

"Nah dude, I'll be okay." Dave reassured. "I've survived worse with less."

"Just because you have doesn't mean you should." Dirk muttered, disdainfully. "I'm not gonna force you to take them if you don't want them, but I'm still going to grab them for you, just in case you do end up wanting them."

Dirk left to go grab the pain meds Dave probably wasn't going to take unless he felt like he really needed them. Dave mulled over the events of the previous day, which at that point felt like it had happened a week ago. His memories of the fight were getting blurrier as the hours passed as he tried to suppress the feelings he had about it down until he was truly neutral on the topic. He couldn't let anyone, let alone his sister know how much the fight had actually got to him.

He then remembered the conversation he, Roxy, and Rose had had where they tried to convince him to learn magick. He still was unsure if he wanted to do it, not wanting to disappoint his Bro, or rather his memory, by doing it. He decided to ask for Dirk's opinion on the matter since he probably knew what was best in the situation.

Dirk came back in and set the little bottle of medicine on the table by the door. "Are you sure you don't need anything?" Dirk asked again, a tiny frown on his face.

"Uh, I have a question, actually. It's kind of dumb, but I'd appreciate your input on it." Dave said.

"Shoot."

"So like, Roxy and Rose offered to start teaching me magick because Rose wants to go back and fight the Witch or whatever and I dunno if I should do it or not. Learn magick, not fight the Witch. Well kinda both, actually. Part of me kind of wants to do it, but like magick's kind of dumb, y'know? I don't know what to do." Dave confessed, feeling dumb for needing advice. Shouldn't he be better than that?

"Listen dude, I'm not gonna make you do anything you don't want to do, but in my opinion I think you should do it. Also, don't say magick's dumb, dude. I get why you feel that way, but magick can be hella cool. I mean, have you seen some of the shit that Jane and Roxy can do? It's fucking dope! And, if Rose is really bent on fighting that Witch again and you go with her, I don't think it's wise to go in without knowing at least a few basic spells." Dirk responded. "But, that's just my take on things. Like I said, I'm not gonna force you to do anything you don't wanna do, but I think you would at the very least enjoy doing magick if you tried it."

"Thanks, dude. I uh, might." Dave replied awkwardly.

"Yeah man, anytime." Dirk pulled his phone out for a moment. "Oh fuck, I didn't realize how late it was. I've gotta go, Dave. Message me if you need anything."

And with that, Dirk rushed out of his room, still managing to quietly close the door behind him.

Dave grabbed his phone off his desk, checking to see if he had any notifications. Still no response from Jade, but there was a message from Roxy.

\-- tipsyGnostalgic [TG] began pestering turntechGodhead [TG] at 6:47 --

TG: hey hun i know you prolly wont see this until im home but i just wanted to ask if you had made a decision on the magick thing yet

TG: its okay if you dont yet!!! no pressure!!!!

TG: ill see u when i get home from class

TG: <3 u!

TG: hey rox idk if youll see this yet but ive made a decision on the whole magick thing

TG: ill do it

TG: but only so im not completely fucking useless when we fight that witch again

TG: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

TG: holy shit!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

TG: omgomgomf

TG: *omg

TG: sorry im driving rn

TG: then stop messaging me?????

TG: dont fucking die????

TG: ugh fine

TG: youd better ve ready when i get home so we can get started asap

TG: *be

TG: can do

TG: luv u!

TG: love you too mom

TG: *rox

TG: haha whoops

TG: stupid autocorrect

TG: :3

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering tipsyGnostalgic [TG] at 7:50 --

Dave plugged his phone back into the charger and set it back on the desk. He flopped back down onto his pillow and fell into a much more restful sleep very quickly.

\---

When Dave woke up again sunlight was streaming through a crack in his curtains and warming a very slim part of his folded wings. It felt astonishingly nice despite it only covering a small area and he could understand why cats enjoyed laying in patches of sunlight so much. He considered opening his curtains and just sunbathing for a while, but he knew he should probably get up and get ready before Roxy got home and skinned him for not being ready.

Dave checked his phone before getting out of bed, finding nothing of real interest aside from some dipshits arguing about the supposed underlying political commentary on one of his blogs. He chuckled a little at it. He always found it funny when people tried to find meaning in the nonsense he created.

He stretched his wings out, groaning at how nice it felt after they'd been flattened against his back all night. As dope as his wings were, he kind of missed the ability to sleep on his side comfortably. Ah, the sacrifices that came with looking sick as shit.

He shuffled his way to the bathroom, contemplating taking a shower or not and wondering if he could get his wings wet. He figured he probably could since some birds fucked around in the rain and seemed to fly around fine after it. He was sure that as long as he didn't get them too wet and he was able to let them dry properly, they would be fine.

Dave stared at the shower for a moment, deciding if he should actually shower or not. Taking his shirt on and off again was a production and he wasn't sure how well he would be able to prevent accidental self-mutilation due to his talons. Then again, not showering made him feel like a fresh sack of garbage, so he figured it would probably be best to, even if it was going to be a fucking ordeal.

He shucked his boxers off and started tugging his shirt off. He managed to yank it over his head and shove it off his wings with a little creative arm twisting and pushing. A shiver travelled down his outstretched wings as if they were trying to shake the uncomfortable feeling off.

Dave leaned down and started the shower, deciding not to be put off by the strange things his wings decided to do. He slipped in after spending a minute or so trying to get the water to a temperature that didn't make him fear for the safety of his skin. He was honestly a bit astounded at how well the water heater in the house worked after spending years growing up in a shitty apartment with a water heater that would last about a minute before completely giving out.

The water rolled off his wings surprisingly better than he had expected. Some water still soaked into his wings, but for the most part they shed the water like a cheap vinyl raincoat. He ran into little trouble with soaping himself down and found that as long as he kept the tips of his fingers relatively flat, he didn't end up scratching himself to shit. He guessed he'd just hyped himself up for nothing.

He got out and towled himself off, experimentally patting his wings down with the towel to see if it would get rid of any extra moisture. He found it worked pretty well, but his wings still felt a little damp. He wasn't sure he wanted to risk blow drying his wings and accidentally burning them or messing up his feathers more than they already were. Since he was going to go outside when he was done getting ready he figured he could kill two birds with one stone and sun them dry when he went out.

He struggled for several minutes trying to get his shirt on over his wet wings before giving up and forgoing the shirt entirely. As much as he hated having the network of scars and freckles on his ridiculously pale chest on full display, he just didn't think he was going to get the shirt on while his wings were damp. Oh well, at least the wings made it look like he was going for some sort of look rather than him not wanting to spend another five minutes wrestling with a shirt.

He finished up getting ready in the bathroom and headed back to his room to retrieve a pair of pants and his shades before heading into the backyard.

When he got outside, Rose was still asleep on the bottom of the pool and he wondered how she could still be asleep when she was in direct sunlight. She could be such an enigma sometimes.

It was surprisingly warm outside for it being mid-September, enough so that he worried that he might burn from the sun exposure. He figured it would probably be fine and if it wasn’t he’d deal with those consequences later.

Dave sat down in one of the deck chairs that was in the shade of the massive umbrella that was in the porch table. He felt a buzz from his phone and he pulled it out.

\-- gardenGnostic [GG] began pestering turntechGodhead [TG] at 12:20 --

GG: hey dave!

GG: sorry for not responding sooner, i just woke up

GG: im doing fine

GG: what the hell happened to you????

GG: are you okay??????

TG: yeah

TG: so uh

TG: nothing happened to you?

GG: no???

GG: was something supposed to?

TG: kinda

TG: uh fuck

GG: ???????

TG: yknow how we fought that witch

GG: yeah

TG: she like cursed rose and i or something

TG: like idk if cursed is the right word

TG: but uh

GG: what did she do????

TG: she birdified me

TG: ive got wings now like some sort of majestic ass eagle

TG: well prolly not an eagle since theyre black

TG: maybe more like a crow or a raven or some other black bird

TG: oh and ive got these claw hands now

TG: tbh its pretty dope but it still kinda sucks ig

TG: cuz were kinda freaks of nature now and so leaving without getting stared at is impossible

TG: which i dont mind really since people already do that to me

TG: like i get it im a hot piece of ass and you wish you could tap this

TG: step off

TG: im not some cheap dimestore whore rich old men can pick up off the corner for a quick fuck

TG: we get it

TG: your wife is leaving you and you need to fill the void in your heart she left after cheating on you with the pool boy

GG: i think people stare at you because youre such a twink!

GG: also because youre so white you pretty much reflect sunlight :p

TG: stfu

TG: im not a twink

TG: im not even gay

GG: :/

TG: anyways

TG: rose cant even leave the house anymore

GG: is rose okay?

TG: yeah shes just a mermaid

TG: or whatever you call a mermaid thats an octopus

GG: cecaelia

TG: yeah that

TG: shes in the pool but she cant really leave for obvious reasons

GG: i mean, she could make herself a water bubble so she could be on land, but i dont know how good her mobility is now

TG: i mean shes not immobile

TG: her mobility is exactly what youd expect from an octopus on land

TG: or at least i assume it is

TG: tbh i havent really seen her move around on her own on land

TG: roxy and i had to carry her down to the pool and she didnt really do much to support herself even tho she said she would

TG: she was able to dive into the pool without us throwing her so i think that counts toward something

TG: like congrats you can still propel yourself forward

TG: you get an a for effort and this shiny little trophy from the dollar store that says you did it

TG: one of the ones thats got a big old #1 poking out of the cup

TG: you can put it up next to the trophies for eating a fruit and drinking water at least once a week

TG: congratulations champ

TG: maybe next week we can go for blinking

TG: ...

TG: ......

TG: you still there?

GG: yeah, sorry!!!

GG: i had to feed bec his breakfast since jake forgot to when he left :p

TG: ah okay

TG: makes sense

TG: how is that hellbeast anyways

GG: hes doing really well!

GG: the day before yesterday he brought home a dead squirrel

TG: holy shit nice

TG: did you save any of it

GG: no, sorry, there wasnt that much to save

GG: hed gotten it pretty good and i felt so bad for it so i buried it in the woods

TG: rip in pieces little dude

TG: may his soul reside forever in squirrel heaven

TG: or hell

TG: idk what that bastard couldve gotten up to

GG: im not sure how much sin a squirrel could commit

TG: are you kidding me

TG: most squirrels commit tax fraud

TG: theyre the worst

GG: :O

TG: yeah man

TG: tbh thats one of the least bad things that they do

GG: what other horrible sins do squirrels commit???

TG: larceny, possession of schedule 1 drugs (not including weed because come on weed doesnt count obvi), grand theft auto, and aggravated assault just to name a few

TG: who knew such small creatures could commit so many heinous crimes

 

Dave heard a car door shut from the front of the house, drawing his attention away from his phone. He heard the front door open and he held his breath, waiting to hear who it was who got home.

"DAAAVE!" Roxy called from somewhere in the house. Dave let out a sigh of relief at it not being his mother. It wasn't that he hated her, it was just that he preferred it when she wasn't around. "YOU'D BETTER BE UP AND READY FOR MAGICK TIME!"

"I'M OUTSIDE!" Dave yelled back.

 

TG: hey jade sorry to cut this short but i gotta go

TG: i promised roxy id let her and rose teach me magick when she got home

GG: what really????

GG: youre actually gonna start learning?????

TG: yeah yeah i know big shocker

TG: you can make fun of me for it later

GG: okay ;)

GG: message me when you get done

TG: alright

TG: see ya

GG: bye!

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering gardenGnostic [GG] at 12:48 --

"Hey Dave!" Roxy greeted, poking her head out the door. "I'm gonna go set my shit down and gank a couple books from Rose's room real quick and then we can get started. Also, put a shirt on, you're gonna blind someone!"

"Nah," Dave replied "It's more of a titties out kind of look."

"Fair." Roxy laughed, before ducking back inside.

Dave relaxed against the chair, stretching his wings out a couple times. It seemed the sun and the unseasonable warmth had done wonders to dry his wings. Maybe he should go back inside and put a shirt on. After all, he could feel his back starting to burn and he didn’t want it to get any worse. He didn’t think he could handle another sunburn that rendered him immobile for two days.

"HEY ROXY?" Dave called out. No response. He didn't know why he expected her to be able to hear him. He gave in and messaged her.

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering tipsyGnostalgic [TG] at 12:50 --

TG: hey rox could you grab my shirt

TG: the one with the holes in it

TG: i think i left it in the bathroom

TG: ya

TG: thanks

TG: np!

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering tipsyGnostalgic [TG] at 12:50 --

 

Roxy came back a minute later, worn spellbooks and his shirt in hand.

"Here you are." Roxy said, handing him his shirt. "Shame about the look."

"Listen, I don't want to die of skin cancer when I'm like 25 because I kept getting nasty fucking sunburns. I'd like to at least put my death off for another couple decades or so, so I can achieve my lifelong dream of becoming a hot dog vendor turned crime fighter. I'll die at the ripe old age of 40 when my archnemesis, the Ice Cream Truck Guy kills me with my own food. It'll be a national tragedy."

"I thought you wanted to be a movie director or a paleontologist?" Roxy teased, setting a couple of the tomes down on the table.

"That was last week, hot dog vendor is the new goal."

Roxy simply laughed in response and ruffled his hair. "You're such a dork."

"You too." Roxy gave him a playful shove.

"Mmkay, are you ready to get your magick on?" Roxy asked twiddling her fingers at him.

"As I'll ever be." Dave responded with a slight sigh.

"Okay, so what we're gonna do first is super simple." Roxy started. "We're gonna figure out what your Elemental Type is."

"I thought anyone could do any kind of elemental spells?" Dave asked, confused.

"Technically they can, but everyone has an element they're better with than the rest. For example: Rose and I's Elemental Type is water, but we can still perform really simple elemental spells of other types. Like I can do all kinds of water manipulation, but the best I can do with fire is light a candle. It’s kinda like Avatar, but everyone’s the Avatar only lowkey. You followin'?"

"Yeah, I think so."

"Good! When you first start out, only one element will actually react to your influence which is how we find your type. I'm gonna start you off with water since you've got three close relatives with that Type." Roxy gestured for him to follow her over to the end of the pool Rose wasn't asleep in. "Mmkay so you're gonna wanna kneel down next to the water like I am and put your palm perpendicular to the surface and repeat after me."

Dave obeyed, awkwardly kneeling down next to the water and extending his hand.

"Fluctus." Roxy evoked, her eyes trained on the water. A pink-tinted wave rippled across the water from her palm and dissipated as soon as it hit the far wall. "It's really simple."

"Okay." Dave nodded, trying to hide the nervousness in his voice. A small part of him was scared of fucking it up somehow or not getting it right on the first try. He told that part of himself to shut up, he was too busy to worry about performance anxiety. "What was the word again?"

"Fluctus." Roxy answered.

"Fluctus." Dave mimicked. Nothing happened.

"Try it again." Roxy encouraged, gently patting him on the back. That made him feel a little better.

"Fluctus." Dave repeated. Nothing happened.

"Okay then." Roxy said, standing up. "I guess water's not your thing, so let's try earth next." She motioned for him to follow her again and she led him across the yard to an empty patch of dirt leftover from when Mom had decided she wanted to try growing her own agave. Needless to say it didn't work, the soil was too acidic and the weather patterns were too erratic to allow them to properly grow. The patch had sat abandoned for months, no one really wanting to do anything about it.

"Okay so what we're gonna do is take a handful of dirt," Roxy explained, flipping through the book she was carrying "and we're gonna turn it into a rock. You're gonna put your hand over the hand that's holding the dirt and you're gonna say 'Pacto Terrae.'"

She set the book down and scooped up a handful of dirt, placing her other hand over it. "Pacto Terrae." She evoked. A soft pink glow surrounded her hands and a distinct 'thunk' resonated outwards. She removed her hand and showed off the dirt-turned-rock. "Ta-da! Now we've got a little rock to add to this useless pile of dirt."

She chucked the rock.

"Landscaping." Dave commented sagely.

"Landscaping indeed." Roxy nodded. "Okay, okay, now it's your turn. Do you remember what to do?"

"Yeah, I think so." Dave replied, going through the motions Roxy had showed him. "Pacto Terrae." Nothing happened.

"Try again." Roxy prompted.

"Pacto Terrae." Dave repeated. Still, nothing happened. He tried not to be discouraged, he understood why the spells weren't working, but  the bullshit voice in his head told him that it was because he wasn't doing it right or trying hard enough.

"Damn okay." Roxy said, putting her hands on her hips. "Let's try fire now and see if we have any luck with that."

Roxy led him back to the table and motioned for him to wait a second while she ran inside to grab something. Dave looked over into the pool to see if Rose had woken up yet, but she remained fast asleep. In all honesty, he was kind of jealous that Rose could sleep so heavily even in the middle of the day with people talking. Years of training had conditioned him to wake up at anything that made noise which he guessed could be useful in case someone broke into the house. More than anything it was annoying since he couldn't get a full night's rest most of the time.

Roxy walked back out holding a stout black candle and a box of matches. She set them on the table and looked down at Dave.

"What are the matches for?" Dave asked.

"Just in case fire turns out to not be your thing we have something for you to practice air magick on." Roxy explained.

"Okay so what do I do to light this baby up?" Dave asked, gesturing to the candle.

"You're gonna wanna hold your hand out like this," Roxy demonstrated holding her hand over the candle with her palm toward the ground. "And what you're gonna say is 'Inardesco.'"

The candle caught fire beneath her hand, the flame tinted a bright pink. She removed her hand from above the flame and blew it out. "Did you get that?"

"Yeah." Dave replied. He held his hand over the candle as Roxy had showed him. "Inardesco."

A bright red flame leapt up from the still smoldering wick of the candle and Dave barely had time to withdraw his hand before the flame grew into a blaze similar to a flamethrower. The flames caught onto the umbrella and the cheap canvas burned like a field during a drought. He'd be lying if he said he didn't think it was kind of sick.

"Oh fuck!" Roxy yelped, motioning from the pool to the fire. "Influunt!"

Water whipped up from the pool and swirled around the two of them before quickly submerging both candle and umbrella before dropping back into the pool with a large splash. Roxy fell down onto her ass, winded from the feat.

"So was that good? What would you rank that in terms of first time magick use? Like a B minus or?" Dave asked after a moment. "'Cause I dunno about you, but I thought that was sick as hell."

"That, was fuckin amazing! I'd totally give you an A for that, which I can, 'cuz I'm your teacher." Roxy cheered, lying down on the ground. "Tbh, it kinda reminds of when Rose first tried magick."

"What happened with that?" Dave asked, sitting down on the ground next to her.

"So Rose was like 7 and she was begging Mom to teach her magick 'cuz that's around when I started learning. Mom of course said no since she thought Rose was too little to do magick, but that didn't stop her,'cuz of course it wouldn't. It's Rose. One night Mom passed out on the couch, drunker than a fuckin sailor and Rose deadass drags her sleeping ass outside and fuckin drenches her using her water magicks. Mom was so fuckin pissed, but she gave in and let Rose start learning with me. I watched the whole thing go down from my bedroom window and it's the most legendary thing I have seen to this day."

"Now that," Dave said "is 100 percent big dick energy.

"Thank you, Dave." Rose replied, causing Dave to jump a little in surprise. He silently berated himself for not hearing her emerge.

"Oh hey Rosie." Roxy waved at her sister from where she was laying. "How long have you been up?"

"Since Dave set the patio set on fire." Rose responded. "I'm offended that you started teaching Dave magick without waking me first. But I suppose it's as the great philosopher, Plato once said: You snooze, you lose."

"Are you sure he-"

"Yes Dave, I'm positive he said that." Rose interrupted, giving him a look.

"Well hey, it's not all bad." Roxy interjected. "You didn't miss the whole figuring out his Aspect thing, just the boring elemental stuff. Well I mean the Aspect thing can be kinda boring too, but like it’s fun to set up."

"I suppose that's true." Rose said. "Still, I'm disappointed that I missed most of his first foray into magick."

"Okay so how do we do the Aspect findy thing?" Dave asked, standing up so he could sit back down in one of the chairs.

"You're gonna need to lay down somewhere quiet and take a little nap." Roxy said, sitting up.

"That's it? Really? No fancy ass tests with lighting shit on fire? I'm kinda disappointed." Dave replied.

"Well that's all you have to do." Rose explained. "Roxy and I will set up the rest of the ritual. Or rather, Roxy will since I can't exactly move currently."

"Is there anything I can help with since you can't do shit?" Dave asked. "Like I could carry stuff or whatever.

"Nah, I've got it." Roxy replied, waving her hand. "It's mostly just carrying a bunch of shit that I can get in one go and then setting all of said shit up. I might let you light the candles, though."

"Alright, if you insist." Dave said with a slight shrug. "I'll just chill here and watch you work like I'm some kind of wealthy old dude who gets a kick out of watching his servants work."

"Have fun with that." Roxy laughed, standing up and stretching. "I'm gonna go grab the stuff now, I'll be back in a sec. Do you guys need anything while I'm gone?"

"I would be eternally in your favor if you brought my phone down." Rose answered.

"One phone coming up!" She strode into the house, leaving Dave and Rose alone.

"How are you holding up?" Rose asked, looking up at him.

"I'm fucking great." Dave replied, mostly honestly. "I'm actually pretty stoked about the whole magick thing, I guess and the whole wings thing is still going strong. Life isn't that bad, all things considered."

"And how are your ribs?"

"They're not killing me, so that's good." It was true, his ribs weren't totally killing him, but they didn't feel great either. Maybe he should've taken the pain meds when he got up.

"You should've taken them." Rose commented.

"What, pain meds? I'm fine. How did you know I didn't take any?" Dave questioned, more than a little startled.

"A good magician never reveals their secrets." Rose replied, coy as she always was with her knowledge. Dave was pretty sure it was some magicky thing, but he wasn’t sure what.

"You cagey bitch." He wasn't sure what he expected her to say, honestly. She always had some way of knowing everything that was going on with someone. He would accuse her of being a mind reader, but she had vehemently denied it many times in the past.

He felt his phone buzz several times in rapid succession, making him jump slightly.

\-- gallowsCalibrator [GC] began trolling turntechGodhead [TG] at 13:34 --

GC: H3Y D4V3

GC: 1S TH1S YOU?

GC: 

     

 

"Who is it?" Rose asked, trying to peer at his screen.

"What, you can't just sense it or whatever it is you do with your magicks?" Dave shot back.

"Ah you're right, how silly of me to ask you a simple question!" Rose mocked. "Let me just call upon the Gods and their infinite wisdom to find out who my brother is talking to. Oh great spirits, lend me your aid so that I may learn who has chosen to bother my sibling at this moment."

 

TG: haha

TG: hell yeah

TG: whats up

 

"What do the Gods and all their infinite wisdom have to say?" Dave asked, not looking up from his phone.

"The Gods say I'm abusing my power to call to them over trivial matters. What am I to do if I get my spiritual phone revoked? How will I ever go on?" Rose gasped, dramatically throwing a hand to her forehead.

 

GC: NOTH1NG MUCH

GC: HOW 4R3 YOU?

 

"I'll buy you a new one."

"You could never. The Gods don't take monetary bribes, they deal in much darker these things these days."

"Such as?"

"Human souls, mostly. However, they will take teeth and precious memories on occasion." Rose clarified.

 

TG: pretty chill

TG: hows school

 

"Damn, that when straight past drama and straight into melodrama faster than a stripper could take off her shorts. Remind me again which Gods these are?"

"The Eldritch kind, mainly."

"Ah, so your many tentacled hentai Gods. That explains the teeth then."

 

GC: BOR1NG 4S H3LL

GC: 4S USU4L

GC: WH3R3 4R3 YOU?

GC: 1 H4V3N'T S33N YOU 4T 4LL TOD4Y

 

"Teeth are some of the most valuable possessions in the arsenal of a magick user and a follower of the Dark Gods."

"Okay, now that's just fucking fake."

"No, I swear it's true. Most rituals to summon or talk to the Horrorterrors involve teeth in some way or another."

 

TG: home

TG: i caught a pretty nasty stomach bug

TG: im pretty much dying

TG: if im not back to school by wednesday you should totally spread a rumor that i died

 

"Human teeth or animal teeth?"

"They'll take either. They're not too picky about what kind of teeth they are, they just want teeth."

"That's so fucking weird."

 

GC: 1 W1LL

TG: sweet thanks

GC: NO PROBL3M

GC: D4V3?

TG: yeah

GC: 1'M ST4RT1NG TO G3T TH3 F33L1NG TH4T YOU'R3 NOT 4CTU4LLY S1CK

TG: dude im totally sick

TG: ive been hella bedridden

TG: im sipping on the little mug of chicken noodle soup as we speak

TG: who knows if my poor tortured gut will be able to keep it down

TG: i cant go through another bed sheet today

TG: why tf do you think im not actually sick

 

Roxy returned, balancing a couple jars of what looked like incense cones on top of an intricately carved wooden box. She set them down on the grass and opened the box, revealing a large black sheet that she pulled out and spread out on the tiles next to the pool. Next, she pulled out a set of multicolored candles and started putting them around the perimeter of the sheet.

"Hey Rose, what's the order again? I can never remember." Roxy yelled.

 

GC: YOUR WORDS SM3LL OF D3C1T

TG: dude ive been telling you the truth

TG: im sick

GC: YOU DON'T H4V3 TO L13 TO M3, D4V3

GC: 1'M NOT GO1NG TO T3LL 4NYON3 TH4T YOU'R3 SK1PP1NG SCHOOL

 

"It goes Time, Breath, Doom, Heart, Light, Rage, Space, Blood, Life, Mind, Void, Hope." Rose recited.

"Thank you!" Roxy called.

 

TG: ugh fine

TG: you got me

TG: im totally intentionally skipping school

TG: im finally embracing my inner bad boy

GC: 1'M SO PROUD OF YOU

TG: thanks

TG: its been a long hard road to get here

TG: but i sure as hell made it

GC: OH FUCK

GC: 1'V3 GOT TO GO, TH3 T34CH3R'S ST4R1NG 4T M3

TG: aight

TG: see ya

GC: BY3

\-- gallowsCalibrator [GC] ceased trolling turntechGodhead [TG] at 13:40 --

 

Roxy placed four metal censers behind the top, rightmost, bottom, and leftmost candles. She set the incense cones into each of the censers, lighting each of them as she went.

"Dave, everything's set up." Roxy said, standing up. "If you wanna come over here and lay down, we can start the ritual."

"Cool. You didn’t make that sound ominous at all." Dave replied, getting up. He stood over the sheet for a moment, pushing down the nervous storm that had started brewing in his chest. He wasn't even fully sure why he was so nervous as he knew it was safe and really not that big of a deal.

He laid down, shifting uncomfortably as his wings were pinned under his body. He hoped it wouldn't take too long, he had barely been down for twenty seconds and his wings were already aching.

"Alright, here we go." Roxy said finally. She held up her arms and closed her eyes. "Omnes Ignium."

All of the candles lit simultaneously, each of them burning in the same color as the base of the candle. The incense seemed swirl around him, causing him to quickly slip into a deep sleep.

 ---

Dave slowly came to, unsure of where he was. An oppressive heat pushed against him from all sides, worse than anything he'd ever felt before. He briefly wondered if he was in some sort of massive oven, but when he opened his eyes, he realized his situation was much worse than he could have ever anticipated.

He was on a thick metal platform suspended over a sea of lava by concerningly flimsy looking metal beams. It didn't seem like the metal was melting or near collapsing, but he didn't trust it for a heartbeat. He wasn't sure what kind of metal the beams were made of, but he was pretty sure whatever it was was probably going to melt.

He stood up, looking for a way off of the precarious platform he had found himself on. There was a long trail of platforms leading off in one direction, decreasing in height the further they got from the platform Dave was on. That was concerningly convenient, but it seemed as if that was the only way to get off the platform that didn't involve throwing himself into the ocean of lava.

He leapt down to the adjacent platform, nearly losing his balance as the structure began to shift beneath him. Of fucking course the other platforms were melting, he wasn't sure why he expected they would be structurally sound. They were on top of lava, for god’s sake. He was an idiot.

He sprinted across the platform, leaping down to the next one that was already collapsing into the lava. He landed on it easily, but it began to heavily lean to one side, forcing him to run against the slope and barely make the jump off of it before it toppled down. He picked up the pace, sprinting as fast as he could to make it to wherever the platforms led before they had all fallen into the magma below.

He barely made it to the next platform several times more than he would've liked. Just once, he found himself running along the beam of where a platform once was, nearly getting his foot caught in one of the ticking gears that pointlessly lined the sides of the towers. If they had a purpose for anything other than being annoying and fitting in with the vaguely steampunk theme the whole place he was in, he didn't know.

Finally, he reached a platform that seemed to be made of a different type of metal that seemed to be more resistant to the heat. Dave stopped for a moment, catching his breath. He was a fairly active person, but he had never been the best when it came to endurance. He stood up straight, taking a deep breath before pressing onwards into the large tunnel that encompassed the path.

The distant sound of a ticking clock got louder and louder the further he got along the walkway to the point where it was almost deafening. He put his hands over his ears, annoyed more than anything. Like he got it, there was a really big clock somewhere and it wanted to make itself known, it didn't have to blow out his eardrums in the process.

The path abruptly ended, cutting off as if it had been abandoned partway through construction. Dave peered off the edge, trying to see if there was anything down there for him. There wasn’t and Dave wondered if he’d managed to go the wrong way. God, he hoped not, he just spent what felt like an hour walking down this stupid metal platform.

Just as he was about to turn around, the platform started to shake violently, making Dave nearly lose his balance. Jesus Christ couldn’t this bullshit hellscape give him a break? He scrambled up the tilting platform, barely managing to grab the edge before it started sinking into the magma.

He hoisted himself up onto the narrow edge of what was still out of the lava, desperately scanning his surroundings for a way out. There were chains hanging from the ceiling, but they were a good fifty feet above him so that wasn’t even close to an option. The walls were completely smooth, save for the occasional hole where more lava poured into the ocean below. Were he not so distracted with trying to keep himself alive, he would’ve questioned where the lava was coming from in the first place.

Alas, there was no way off of the platform that he could see. He closed his eyes and stepped off the platform, deciding that if he was going to die he was going to do it himself instead of waiting to get swallowed up by molten rock. He waited for the inevitable smack of him hitting the lava, but it never came.

Instead, he realized that he was once again standing on something solid. He supposed it was better than burning to death.

Intricately carved golden walls rose around him, gently curving into a beautiful dome shaped roof. Lava poured from four fountain-like outcroppings on the walls, the molten stone falling to somewhere beneath the floor. The floor was a massive functioning clock face that ticked silently underneath his feet, which he found odd due to its size and the obnoxious ticking that had plagued his walk down the platform.

When Dave looked up from the floor he barely kept himself from jumping in surprise at the sudden materialization of a giant beast on the other end of the clock. It's entire body was engulfed in flames and utterly ineffable. A pair of blood-red eyes peered down at him from the black mass he could only assume was supposed to be the head.

"Hello, knight." The being greeted, it's voice as indescribable as it's body. "I am Hephaestus, Lord of the Forge and Overseer of all matters Temporal.

"Uh, hi. That's quite the title you've got there." Dave responded. "So are you the dude that's gonna judge my soul or whatever and give me my magickal aspect placement like the goddamn sorting hat from Harry Potter. Cuz if so, can I just request to not be put in Slytherin or whatever the equivalent of that would be in aspect terms. Idk if this shit's predetermined or not so my whole request thing is kind of banking on that. Also, my name is Dave, you don't have to give me some kind of fancy ass formal title."

"I am aware of your name, knight." The being replied. "I'm afraid you do not get a say in your Aspect as it was determined at your birth."

"Fuck." Dave stated. "So are you gonna tell me what it is or nah? Cuz like, if this is one of those you've gotta figure it out on your own type deals I'd like to wake up now. I'm pretty sure I've got it just based off this hellhole dream dimension I got sent to. Also your title kind of gave it away so if you have a riddle for me I'd just skip it and get straight to the point."

"And what do you believe your Aspect is, knight?" The being queried.

"Time, obviously."

 ---

Dave woke up for the third time, this time somewhere familiar. Roxy was staring at him in shock.

"What?" Dave asked, sitting up and stretching his pained wings out. "Did something go wrong?"

"You were only out for like thirty minutes, that can't be right." Roxy replied, concerned. "What the hell happened? Are you okay?"

"I'm fine." Dave said. "There's no way in hell that was thirty minutes, that felt like it was at least an hour. Is that bad?"

"I don't think it is." Roxy responded, frowning slightly. "It just normally takes way longer to find out. Like it took about two and a half hours for me and one and a half for Rose. It's pretty much unheard of for it to take less than an hour."

"That is the case with most Aspects." Rose chimed in, surfacing from the pool. Ever the know-it-all. "However, with Time it isn't uncommon for someone to take less than an hour to find out. I thought it was a more commonly known fact."

"Well evidently, it's not." Dave commented. "So I guess it's pretty obvious then, my Aspect is Time. That's pretty cool I guess."

"What happened to you while you were asleep?" Roxy asked, excited.

"I woke up on this really shitty metal platform in the middle of this lava ocean and I had to parkour my way off of it and onto these other platforms that started collapsing like a dry sand castle in a rainstorm. So I ran down them like the parkour master that I am and then there was this really long platform that took up most of the dream time. I swear, that thing had to have been at least a mile long maybe three, it was kind of bullshit. After that I pretty much got knocked off the platform and into the lava, but surprise surprise, it wasn't death it was a magickal destiny. I woke up on this ridiculously large clock and there was this..." Dave struggled to find the words to explain it. After all, how does one describe God's face with mortal language. "I dunno how to describe it, but it was this being who called itself Hephaestus. It didn't even tell me anything which was kind of garbage, but it's not like I was incapable of figuring it out myself. The entire place was covered in clockwork, it wasn't exactly subtle."

"That makes sense. A majority of dreamscapes are related in some way to the person's Aspect. Less than two percent report dreamscapes that didn't relate to their Aspect." Rose explained.

"As someone who falls in that two percent, I cannot tell you how fucking annoying it was to be walking around on a world that was lit up like a fuckin' Christmas tree only to find out from my Denizen that my Aspect is Void." Roxy added.

"So what I'm getting from this is that my experience was pretty fucking lame as far as dream quests go." Dave stated, deadpan.

"That's not true." Rose objected. "As far as dreamscapes go, yours is one of the more danger-laden I've ever heard of. Although, that could just be a result of where you fall on the passivity scale. I've heard that more active magick users tend to have a more difficult time getting through them in one piece. The challenges their dreamscapes bring can reveal a lot about a particular magick user's psyche. For example: from what you told me, I can glean that you struggle with recklessness and you hide your true self and emotions from everyone which are threatening to spill out at any moment. Although, I wouldn't need your dream to know that about you."

"How the fuck did you get all of that from my dream?" Dave asked, a little put off. He wasn't nearly as reckless as Rose could be and he had great control over his emotions.

"I've read up extensively on the subject of dreamscapes and their meanings. I could go on if you'd like." Rose offered.

"Nah, I'm good. You can save the rest of your analysis for my file or whatever." Dave replied.

"Fine." Rose said, rolling her eyes. "But if you ever want to know, you can always ask."

"I might." Dave responded, completely intending to never do that. He liked to think that he knew himself pretty well and he didn't like people coming in and telling him stuff about himself that weren't true.

Dave got up and stretched out, trying to get his stiff back to pop. His ribs ached in protest, causing him to stop mid-stretch and relax his back. Maybe he should've taken some medicine.

"So, what now?" Dave asked, breaking the silence that had befallen the trio.

"Now that we've gotten you past the testing phase, the real training can begin!" Roxy cheered. "Rose and I can teach you all the elemental stuff that you need to know, but you're kinda on your own for learning your Aspect."

"I have a set of books up in my room ranging from beginner to advanced spellcasting on every Aspect. So, if you're wondering where to start off, I think that would be a good place. I can help you if you need anything." Rose offered.

"Thanks." Dave replied genuinely. "I'll look into that." It was probably better than looking up spells on the internet and having to scroll through an elaborate backstory on every blog post that had a spell he might be interested in. Jade had told him that recipe bloggers and spell bloggers were very similar in that aspect. He trusted her on that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry this took so long!  
> all of your comments are so sweet and i really appreciate them <3  
> the next chapter should hopefully be up sooner than this one was


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HES HERE
> 
> also the tag about the pesterlogs is very true for this chapter sorry if thats not your jam

Dave fiddled with his phone, struggling to get it set up on the makeshift stand he'd made out of a stack of spellbooks he'd been studying from earlier. He'd been attempting magick for the past week, mostly with little success. It was becoming increasingly frustrating for him as more time passed because he felt like he should be making progress way faster than he was. The most he'd been able to do Aspect-wise was freezing a candle flame in place mid-flicker for about ten seconds before his magick stopped working. Roxy and Rose assured him that it was normal to struggle with magick at first, but that did little to calm his frayed nerves.

Which is exactly why he was taking a break and video chatting with John and holding true to his promise he'd made a week prior.

"Can you see me okay?" Dave asked, taking a few steps back from his precariously balanced phone.

"Yep!" John called back. "Get on with it, I've got homework to do and my Dad will flip his shit if he finds out I haven’t done it yet."

"I remember homework." Dave mused dramatically.

"You've been out of school for like a week, shut up." John responded. "You're gonna have so much shit to catch up on when you get back. We'll see who's laughing then."

"Bold of you to assume I’ll ever go back." Dave replied, rolling his eyes. "Do you wanna see me do it or not?"

"Yes!" John responded, impatient.

"Lame." John called. Dave flipped off the camera.

"Fuck off, I'm just getting started." He huffed.

Dave flapped his wings again, more purposefully this time and managed to gain a fair amount of height. He somehow managed to forget that he needed to flap again to maintain the height and he crashed back down to the ground, landing gracelessly on his ass. Wow, that hurt like a bitch. Wasn't dirt supposed to be softer than that?

He stumbled back to his feet, giving a thumbs up to the camera. "I'm good." He assured.

He tried again, this time remembering to flap more than once to keep himself in the air. To his mild surprise, it worked. Alright, now that he was in the air he should try actually flying to another spot in the yard.

He angled his wings and body slightly back, trying to mimic how birds looked in flight without making himself look like an idiot. It worked well enough to give him confidence to try flying a lap around the yard. He picked up a bit of speed as he went around, finding that straightening his body out caused less resistance. Of course it did, it's not like wind resistance stopped existing because he had magickal wings.

He made it back to where he had started and was faced with a problem: How was he supposed to land? He stopped leaning back as much and tried to flap less to see if that would bring him closer to the ground. It did, but even with how gentle he was trying to be, he managed to land awkwardly and ended up falling over.

"Holy shit!"

Dave looked up from the ground at his phone. Oh yeah, he was on a call with John.

"I'm good." Dave called. Fuck, he was tired. He never realized how draining flying could be. It made sense why it would be, now that he thought about it. He laid back on the grass. Not moving for a while would be cool.

"That was so cool!" John yelled from his phone. Dave knew he should probably grab it, but he wanted to spend a few more seconds laying down.

"Thanks!" Dave yelled back.

After a moment, Dave dragged himself off the ground and picked his phone off the pile of books.

"Did you enjoy the show?" Dave asked, plopping down in one of the deck chairs.

"Yeah! Holy shit dude, I didn't think you could do it!" John admitted excitedly.

"Wow rude." Dave replied with mock offense. "I'm hurt that you would have so little faith in me, your best friend."

"Oh come on, Dave. You're clumsy as hell." John laughed. "I've seen you trip over your own feet and sprain your wrist, of course I expected you to hurt yourself more."

"That's real fucking funny coming from the guy that shot himself with a nerf dart in the eye and had to wear an eyepatch for a week." Dave retorted.

"I'm pretty sure tripping over your own feet is clumsier than shooting yourself in the eye with a dart. Also, the eyepatch made me look like a pirate so your argument is invalid."

"Dude you only thought the eyepatch was cool 'cuz you had a massive crush on Vriska."

"So? Just because I had a crush on the Mega Bitch™, doesn't change the fact that I looked cool." John responded, looking embarrassed.

"I'm just teasing you, man. Chill. We've all had crushes on people we regret. Or like, past relationships we regret. Kinda both in this case."

"God, why were we so dumb in middle school?"

"Hormones, probably." Dave shrugged.

John looked away from his laptop for a second, a concerned look overtaking his features. "Fuck, it sounds like my Dad just got home." John cursed. "I've gotta go for now, but would you wanna come over later for dinner and maybe a couple rounds of Mario Kart?"

"Oh hell yeah, dude. I'll take any opportunity to kick your ass on the track." Dave replied, excited to finally be getting out of the house.

"As if." John laughed. "I always kick your ass."

"Sure, dude."

"Fuck off." John flipped off the camera. "Dinner should be around six. Do you need a ride over?"

"Nah, I think Roxy should be able to take me. That or, I could fly over." Dave answered, giving his wings a little flap.

"If you do, you'd better not crash into my roof. I can't pay to get the roof fixed again this year."

"I won't, God. Why do you have so little faith in me?"

"Because you're a dick, and you suck." John replied, trying and failing to put a mean edge in his voice. He looked away from his computer again. "Fuck, I've really gotta get going. Sorry dude! I'll see you in a bit."

"See ya." Dave responded, waving as the screen cut to black. 

Well fuck, there went his excuse to not study. He shot a couple messages to some of his friends, but no one seemed to be online. He groaned and leaned back, letting his wings spread out. Maybe he could do a couple laps around the yard to keep himself distracted from what he was supposed to be doing?

He stood up and tried taking off, but his tired wings just weren't having it. Guess there was no other option that didn't include the same amount of effort.

He opened the tome he'd nabbed from Rose's room to the page he'd last been on. He was working on spells so incredibly basic, he felt like an imbicile for not getting them easily. He set the book back down and lit the candle that had become a permanent fixture on the table. He read over the spell one more time, just to be sure and focused on the flame.

" _Prohibere_." He evoked, holding his hand out like the diagram showed. The flame stopped mid-flicker and Dave almost lost his focus from how surprised he was at getting it on the first try. He held it in place for the greater part of a minute, before he stopped out of boredom.

He attempted the spell a few more times, consistently getting the flame to freeze much to his delight. Huh, maybe taking a break did help. Roxy was going to be so proud of him probably for both the break and the magick.

He moved on to the next spell in the book, what was listed as a "simple" time reversal spell. It seemed easy enough, but past experience with the last couple of spells told him otherwise. He skimmed over the words, not bothering to read it all since most of it was the history of the spell and other such nonsense. He tried to get a feel for the words on his tongue, having learned from Rose that pronounciation was key in making sure a spell went right.

" _Retrorsum Converti_." He evoked, focusing on the candle and doing the dumb little gesture the book insisted he had to do.

The flame flickered oddly enough to make Dave feel like he had gotten it before it decided it'd had enough of Dave's magick and reverted back to normal.

He cursed and sat back in his chair, annoyed. He'd just made progress and now he wasn't. Fuck everything.

His phone buzzed and he dragged it out of his pocket, eager to get away from what was frustrating him.

\-- grimAuxiliatrix [GA] began trolling turntechGodhead [TG] at 16:23 --

GA: Dave

GA: Do You Know If Rose Is About

GA: She Hasnt Responded To Any Of My Messages And Im Beginning To Grow A Little Concerned

TG: like in how long

GA: A Day And A Half

GA: I Initially Assumed She Was Asleep But Since So Much Time Has Passed I Suspect That Shes Ignoring Me

TG: oh fuck

TG: im sorry dude

TG: ill go check if shes up

GA: Thank You

Dave looked into the pool, trying to see his sister. She was passed out on the bottom of the pool, her whole body sprawled out like she was on some lavish bed. He still had no idea how she could sleep with so much light shining on her.

TG: it doesnt look like shes awake

GA: Fuck

TG: is there any particular reason you need to talk to her

GA: Well I Asked Her A Question Yesterday And She Dropped Off The Face Of The Earth When She Read It

TG: what did you ask

TG: if its some sappy marital bullshit then i dont wanna know

TG: if its p much anything else i might be able to help

GA: I Asked Her Why You And Her Really Werent At School

GA: When I Asked A Few Days Ago She Said That You Were Sick

GA: But More And More Time Passed And She Was Refusing To Let Me Come Over To Make Her Some Hot Tea Or Soup So I Began To Feel As If Something Else Was Afoot

GA: I Could Of Course Be Wrong

GA: I Doubt It

GA: If So I Would Appreciate You Being Straightforward With Me And Not Dodging Around The Question Like Jade And Rose Have Been

TG: well if you need someone to be straight with you im certainly the guy to go to

GA: I Still Dont Think Youre Straight But Go On

TG: rude

TG: but uh wow i cant believe rose isnt telling you something as big as this

TG: ig its up to me to deal with this

TG: so im gonna send you a picture and youve gotta promise not to freak out

GA: I Promise

Dave crept to the edge of the pool and snapped a quick picture of his slumbering sister. He almost felt bad for it, but Kanaya deserved to know what was up with her girlfriend. He decided to also send a picture of himself for good measure. Just so she would know why both of them were out and maybe so he could get her to custom tailor a couple of shirts for him so he could stop destroying his regular wardrobe. She probably wouldn't, but he could always hope.

GA: Oh

GA: Oh My

GA: That Is Certainly Something

TG: yep

TG: thats certainly one way to describe it

GA: How Did This Happen

TG: we fought a witch

TG: she cursed us

TG: jade got out okay for whatever reason which is why shes been in school

TG: but uh yeah

TG: this is why weve been missing so much

TG: idk if wings and tentacles fit within the school dress code

TG: if short shorts are banned for being "too distracting" i think new appendages land on a whole nother level

TG: like spaghetti straps and shorts are softball and magickal limbs are rugby

TG: idk if thats how sports leagues work

GA: Its Not

TG: cool i dont care

GA: Its Understandable That Such A Thing Would Deter You From School But Im Sure If You Spoke With The Principal Hed Be More Than Accommodating For You Two

TG: thanks but id rather not got to noir about this

TG: if anything we could just finish the year through online school

TG: tbh im not sure how long were gonna be stuck like this for

TG: rose says that weve gotta fight the witch again and get her to fix us or kill her to break the spell

TG: and seeing as we got our asses kicked into next tuesday its gonna be a hot minute before were ready

GA: If You Need Someone To Assist You When The Time Comes To Fight Her Again I Would Be More Than Willing To Go

TG: sweet

TG: you can join our team of shitty superheroes

TG: the avengers but teenagers and were not saving anyone

GA: So Not Like The Avengers At All

TG: yeah

GA: I Think We Should Come Up With A New Name For Us

TG: you can do that if you want

TG: nothings set in stone rn so you can do whatever you want  


GA: I Will Need Some Time To Think On It But I Will Come Up With Something

TG: cool

GA: Oh

GA: Could I Make Costumes For All Of Us

GA: I Think That Would Tie The Whole Thing Together

TG: sure knock yourself out

TG: id be down for some new ass kicking threads

TG: you should do them in red or something

TG: red looks good on me

TG: and also i think its like the associated color of my aspect or whatever

GA: I Heard That You Started Learning Magick

GA: Im Very Excited For You

GA: Is It Going Well

TG: yeah ig

TG: im kinda taking a break rn cuz it was being stupid and frustrating

GA: Im Sorry That Youre Having A Hard Time With It

GA: It Gets Easier As You Learn

GA: Or At Least That Was The Case For Me

TG: roxys been saying that

TG: and so has rose

TG: fuck ig it must be true

TG: its like learning to ride a bike or whatever

TG: youve gotta fall off and get scraped up before you can compete in the x games

TG: im like 90% sure that xtreme biking is in the x games

GA: Youre Right About Learning Magick Being Like Riding A Bike

GA: Thats A Wonderful Metaphor For It

TG: i think thats the first time anyones ever complimented one of my metaphors

TG: thanks i think

GA: No Problem

GA: Oh Also Im On My Way Over To Your House

GA: I Have Some Soup If You Would Like Any

TG: im good thanks tho

TG: the front should be unlocked

GA: Thank You

\-- grimAuxiliatrix [GA] ceased trolling turntechGodhead [TG] at 16:49 --

Dave set his phone down and glared at the spellbook. He still had an hour or so to kill and he knew he should work on magick more since he'd spent the past few hours fucking around, but he just couldn't get up the motivation to. He closed the book and blew out the candle before heading back inside.

He laid face down on his bed and groaned into his pillow. Why was everything so hard? He dicked around on his phone for a while, managing to grind out a nigh incomprehensible blog post on the history of matches. He checked the time. He still had a half an hour to kill before he could leave. Maybe some more friends would be online now?

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering gardenGnostic [GG] at 17:15 --

TG: are you on now

TG: pls say yes

GG: i am!

GG: whats up?

TG: im bored as dicks thats whats up

TG: i spent like three hours trying to do magick today and it fucking sucked

TG: i was able to get a grand total of one thing to work

GG: well thats better than nothing!

TG: youre right but it still sucks

TG: idk what about it is so goddamn difficult for me

TG: its just some fancy words and gestures

TG: it shouldnt be that hard

GG: well magick is always hard when you start out!

GG: dont tear yourself up about it so much

TG: youre like the third person to tell me that today

GG: :/

GG: im just trying to help

TG: ik

TG: sorry im just hella frustrated and being a dick

GG: its okay

GG: i think part of your problem is youre not believing in yourself enough

GG: like youll go to do something but because you had a hard time starting off you just cant get it to work how you want

GG: kind of like a mental block

TG: im p sure that is exactly what a mental block is

GG: haha yeah

TG: on a different note of learning shit i tried flying today

GG: !!!!!!!

GG: howd that go????

TG: fuckin spectacular

TG: i was like a goddamn bird i was so slick

TG: all gliding around and catching those updrafts

TG: i looked so cool

GG: thats so cool!!

GG: youll have to show me some time

TG: i will

TG: idk if youre ready for it now tho

TG: its pretty fucking amazing

GG: i bet!!

TG: so what are you up to

GG: homework ://///

GG: calculus homework is so boring i wish i didnt have to do it

GG: i know could take the test right now and i would pass with flying colors

GG: i dont need this stupid review

GG: all it is is a waste of my time and effort!!!

TG: damn someones awfully steamed about this

GG: shut up!!!

GG: you would understand if you had to do it

TG: do you need to take a break or something

TG: like its not really my place to do this but im going over to johns house for dinner and video games

TG: would you wanna come

GG: i would love to!

GG: can you ask him

TG: you ask him

GG: youre the one offering it

TG: ugh fine

TG: one sec

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering ectoBiologist [EB] at 17:26 --

TG: hey dude

TG: is it okay if jade comes over too

EB: yeah man!

EB: the more the merrier!

TG: cool

TG: well be over in a bit

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering ectoBiologist [EB] at 17:27 --

TG: he said yeah

GG: sweet

GG: do you need a ride over?

TG: probably

TG: i said i could fly over earlier but my wings are tired

TG: and also roxys not home yet so i wouldnt really have a way to get there

TG: so yeah i need a ride

GG: okay

GG: ill be over in a few

GG: grab whatever you need now so i dont have to waste gas waiting for your slow ass

TG: okay wow harsh

TG: im not that slow

GG: dave you take forever to get ready

TG: okay thats true but like

TG: if yall didnt constantly insist on being on time to everything this wouldnt be a problem

GG: hush up and get your stuff

GG: im on my way over

TG: aight

\-- gardenGnostic [GG] ceased pestering turntechGodhead [TG] at 17:30 --

Dave sat up and got out of bed, plugging his phone in so it could charge a little before he left. He didn't want his phone dying on him only to turn it back on to find half a million messages from a very concerned Dirk. Sometimes he wondered why Dirk worried about him so much, he was almost an adult and he could take care of himself just fine. He didn't need someone watching over him constantly. Or at least whenever they weren't busy with school or their two jobs. He would wonder how Dirk kept himself going for so long, but he already knew what it was. Dave was pretty sure Dirk was more energy drink than person at this point.

Since he didn't have that much to grab, he instead went into the bathroom to make sure he didn't look like a complete dumpster fire. His hair was a little messed up from flying around, but otherwise it was fine. Nothing a little finger combing couldn't fix. His face seemed fine, other than the stray bits of acne that no amount of face wash could get rid of. He'd accepted the fact that he probably wouldn't be fully rid of it until he was in his twenties.

He sniffed at his shirt, trying to decide if it smelled too sweaty to be worn around other people. It smelled alright, not fresh out of the wash nice, but decent enough. It would probably be fine.

He gave himself one last look over before heading back downstairs. He decided to poke his head out the door to see if Rose was up so he could tell her where he was going instead of going through all the trouble of messaging someone.

She was up and talking with Kanaya. Oh yeah, Kanaya came over. Rose looked around her girlfriend and gave him a glare that could kill a man. She was totally gonna skin him when he got back.

"David." Rose said flatly. "Can I talk to you?"

"Nope." Dave replied. "I'm going over to John's for a bit so we can talk about this later and also not in front of your girlfriend."

Dave quickly shut the door behind him and speed-walked over to the front door. He probably still had a few minutes before Jade got there, but he would rather avoid any type of confrontation with Rose for the time being. That was a problem he'd have to deal with in the future.

He sat for a few minutes, tapping out a few rhythms on his leg. He considered getting his phone out to record, but that was too much of a hassle. He'd probably remember them later anyways so he could get an actually decent recording instead of that amateur bullshit.

Dave heard a car pull up in the driveway and he got up and got out of the house. However, when he got outside, it quickly became apparent that it wasn't Jade, but his Mom who had vanished for two weeks. It was pretty normal for her to vanish for weeks at a time and Dave was used to it at that point.

"Davey!" She greeted, her voice laced with a slurred cheerfulness. "Iss been so looong."

"Hey Mom." Dave said stiffly. He didn't hate her, she just made him very... uncomfortable.

"Coulj you be a dear and help me inside? One of my heels broke an I can -hic- can't walkk." She asked, throwing her arms around him. If she noticed his wings, she didn't show it.

"Uh sure." Dave replied, gently prying her off of him and into a more carryable position.

He supported her as she stumbled inside and fell down on the couch. He grabbed a trashcan from the kitchen and set it down next to her. Knowing her, she'd probably need it soon.

"I'm heading over to John's house for a bit. I dunno when I'll be back." Dave said, already heading back outside. She gave no response and Dave figured she'd passed the fuck out.

He sat down on the porch and check his phone, nothing from Jade yet. It was probably good that she hadn't sent anything, considering she was driving and all. He checked his messages, deliberately ignoring the few from Rose. No one else was on and the few people he'd shot messages to earlier hadn't seen them. Where was his instant gratification? What was the point of instant messaging if there was no one to instantly message him back?

He checked up on his latest blog post, scrolling past the barely comprehensible paragraphs to the forums below. There were the couple of regulars that always commented on his posts that didn't seem to get his brand of humor. No matter how long it went on, he still thought it was hilarious.

Dave looked up from his phone, seeing Jade's green truck pull into the driveway. She waved at him.

"Come on, Dave!" She called, leaning out her window. "We're already running late."

"Fashionably late." Dave replied, slipping into the passenger seat. "I don't know why ya'll're always in a rush. Not everything requires punctuality."

"Well for me, I just have a hard time getting up on time. Or I end up napping way past the time I need to get up and so I have to get places really fast so I'm not super late." Jade explained, turning around and pulling out of the driveway. "I can't speak for Rose and John, but I think they just don't like being late. I think it's pretty funny that Rose likes to be so punctual since she's always so reluctant to go do things unless she wants to."

"Yeah." Dave agreed, shifting awkwardly in the seat, trying to accommodate his wings. Folding them against his back was the best he could do, but it was still uncomfortable. He made a mental note to ask to ride in the bed on the way back. "It's really just weird with Rose. Like, with John it's kinda expected, growing up in a house with actual structure or whatever, but Rose is a goddamn enigma. I've been living with her for the past seven months and I still don't know how she manages to do it. I'll see her ten minutes before we have to leave, having just gotten up and by the time we have to go she's way more ready than I am. I'd blame it on magick, but she is insistent that she's just that fast at getting ready. There's no way in hell that she got her shot ready the night before, because let's face it, she's one of the most disorganized people I've ever fucking met. She claims that she is organized, just not organized in the manner that regular people are. Those are the exact words she used I shit you not."

"I can kind of relate to that last part." Jade laughed. "But I think a lot of people can, really. Everyone's got their own brand of organization or disorganization."

"Yeah, I guess." Dave nodded, absentmindedly staring out the window. "It's that whole everybody's special thing or whatever."

"Exactly!"

The drive wasn't very long as John only lived a few minutes away from Dave and Rose. He lived in the same big house in the middle of the suburbs that he had for his entire life which Dave found himself being a little jealous of at times.

He had never been in one place for longer than a few months at a time when he was young since his Bro was always getting them kicked out of apartments for really dumb reasons. They'd ended up moving to Skaia about nine and a half years ago and they'd only stayed for as long as they did because Bro had allegedly managed to land a solid job and close family was nearby.

Jade's door slammed and Dave jumped a little, not realizing that he'd been spacing out. He got out of the car and followed Jade across the well-manicured lawn and up to the absolutely normal looking front door. Jade raised her hand to knock but the door was pulled open before she could.

"Hey guys!" John greeted, beckoning them inside. "Dinner should be ready in just a few minutes."

"Cool." Dave responded, immediately plopping down on the couch.

The TV was on, playing a rerun of Family Feud. Ah, Steve Harvey you old fox, still losing your mind about dicks I see. John snorted. Wait shit, did he say that out loud? It wasn't even that funny. He could say way funnier shit. Why was John so easily entertained?

"Dinner's ready!" Jane called, presumably from the kitchen. "Come get it while it's hot!"

The three of them casually made their way into the kitchen at a pace that would be considered totally reasonable by most and sat down at the table. Dave noticed that John's Dad wasn't home which he thought was pretty weird since he was almost always there.

"Hey John, where's your Dad?" Jade asked before Dave could.

"He's out getting dinner with some work friends, I think." John answered, filling his plate with whatever dish Jane had whipped up for dinner. Dave was pretty sure it was some sort of Mexican dish, but he wasn't sure what the name was. It tasted good and that's about all he cared about.

"So Dave," Jane started "How is life with wings treating you? I hope this doesn't come off as rude, I'm just genuinely curious."

"It's pretty chill. I can't really lay on my back anymore which sucks, but the ability to fly kinda makes up for it. Like yeah, I've lost some basic comfort shit, like being able to sit in most chairs normally. I look cool, though, so I don't think it matters that much. You know what they say, "beauty is pain." But instead of heels or makeup and actual pain it's just these dope ass wings making life just the slightest bit more inconvenient." Dave replied between bites.

"Well, I'm glad you're enjoying yourself so much." Jane responded with a small smile.

The rest of dinner was quiet as they were too preoccupied by their food to do much talking. Dave had to keep himself from laughing out loud as John looked miserable with every bite he took. John couldn't handle even the smallest amount of spice and Dave thought it was hilarious.

After dinner, Jane shooed the three of them out of the kitchen, insisting that she could do the dishes herself and that John needed to take care of his guests. John changed the TV so that the Wii was up and turned towards the other two.

"Okay, so do we wanna play Mario Kart, or Mario Party?" John asked.

"I don't really care." Jade replied, sitting down in the massive, dadly armchair. "You guys can pick."

"Uh fuck." Dave answered. "I don't really have a preference either, but since I have to choose: Mario Party? Three player Mario Kart is kind of hard to see on your TV."

"Hey, not all of us can have giant TVs, Dave." John said with mock offense. He put the game disk in and they started playing.

They chose their characters as they always did, John playing Luigi, Jade playing Daisy, and Dave playing Waluigi. For the meme, obviously.

"Okay what board do you guys want to play? I want to play the train one, but if you guys want to play something else, I'm game." John stated.

"Booty. Booty. Booty. Booty. Booty." Dave and Jade chanted in frightening unison.

"Oh come on, guys. We always play that one!" John whined.

"But, the booty." Dave replied. "Would you seriously deny us the booty?"

"Yes." John answered. "We're gonna play the train one now, because you guys need some variety in your lives."

"Boo!" Jade yelled, throwing a couch pillow at her cousin. But it was too late, the board was selected and they were stuck on this train whether they liked it or not.

They got through the first few rounds, constantly berating the NPC for how poorly it was doing. It was partway through one of these roast sessions that Jade started to act strangely.

Her voice had a peculiar bite to it that it normally lacked and her silly insults began to be punctuated with animalistic growls. Dave turned back to look at her from where he was sitting and cursed when he saw what was happening to his friend.

Her hair had shifted to a blinding shade of white that was a stark contrast against her dark skin. Her sclera had changed to a jet black and her irises had gained an eerie glow that was more than a little off putting. Her canines seemed to have sharpened themselves and looked rather fitting for their name. A pair of ears sprouted from the top of her head, bearing a striking resemblance to those of a wolf. Fuck, was Jade some kind of werewolf? That was way cooler than his wings. Fuck.

"Hey uh, Jade, are you okay?" John asked, backing away from her slowly. She stared at him for a moment and then she barked. An honest to God bark. Under normal circumstances Dave would've found that hilarious and to a degree, he still did, but the effect was slightly dampened by the dramatic transformation that was overtaking his best friend.

She turned her phantasmagoric gaze to Dave and he suddenly felt very small. He wasn't the smallest of his friends by any means, he was around the second tallest out of the group of people he regularly hung out with. The tallest however, was Jade and the magickal additions only added to her already intimidating stature.

Dave instinctively reached to his side to grab his sword, before realizing that he didn't have it with him. He backed away from Jade as she began advancing on him, seemingly more interested in him than she was in John. He considered that a good thing. As long as he could keep her attention off John, he could get her away from other people so she wouldn't accidentally hurt someone.

His back hit the wall and he slowly stood up, trying not to set her off more. He made a small motion with his head towards John, signaling him to get out of the way of the door so he could lead Jade outside. John stared back at him, confused for a moment, before he caught on and moved.

Jade leapt at him like a wild dog would with its prey. Dave narrowly avoided her growing claws, managing to throw the door open and take flight as soon as his foot hit the edge of the porch. Jade chased him outside, falling into a four-legged run as her body changed from human to canine. White fur sprouted from her dark skin, quickly covering her form and keeping her at least somewhat modest as her clothes were torn apart.

As her transformation completed, she started jumping and snapping her jaws at Dave's feet. She nearly got one of his shoes before he realized he should probably lead her somewhere more inconspicuous so no one would see her or Dave. And, it would probably keep her from injuring anyone or herself.

Dave surveyed the area, trying to decide where would be best to lead her. During his surveying, he couldn’t help but notice the full moon. Of course the moon was full, why wouldn’t it be? What else did he expect? Some sort of new moon werewolf?

The forest might be a good place to take her, or an open field. The forest was probably the safer bet, despite having a batshit insane witch in it. Jade knew the woods well and she would be able to find her way home relatively quickly if or when she changed back.

Dave set off, soaring as low as he dared to keep Jade interested in him while staying relatively out of view of the many houses. He tried to lead her down back roads as much as possible, but still trying to keep the main roads in sight. He wasn't as well acquainted with the back roads as well as he was with the main roads which is why he tried not to stray too far from them.

After what felt like hours of flying and trying to keep her focus on him, he got Jade to her house and into the forest. Dave found himself struggling to fly through the branches with the same adeptness that he sort of had in the open air.

He quickly lost sight of Jade as she found something more interesting to chase through the undergrowth. Well bye then.

He landed on a branch, nearly crashing into it with how heavily winded he was from the long flight and inexperience. He was surprised at how long his wings held up as he'd found himself on the brink of collapsing several times before he hit the city limits. He leaned against the tree, trying to regain some energy before he had to get himself out of the tree.

There was no way in hell he was flying all the way back to John's house with the amount of exhaustion pumping through his veins. He was going to ask Jake for a ride back as soon as he got down from the tree. It was going to be a while.

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering ectoBiologist [EB] at 19:36 --

TG: hey dude

TG: sorry for kinda ditching you without a word

EB: it's okay.

EB: are you okay?

TG: yeah

TG: i managed to get jade to that forest behind her house

TG: aka the place where all this bullshit started

EB: is she okay? that doesn't sound very safe...

TG: shes prolly fine knowing her and i think shes okay

TG: shes a dog and she cant really talk

TG: but im guessing shes good

TG: she wasnt limping around like a civil war amputee at the very least

TG: i kinda lost her tho

EB: how the hell did you lose her???

TG: well we hit the forest and she ran off

TG: yknow

TG: like a wild fucking animal

TG: like i said, im sure shes fine

EB: i hope so.

EB: are you gonna come back soon?

TG: yeah

TG: im up in a tree rn but as soon as i get off ill be omw

TG: dont get too lonely without me

TG: i know you get lonely when youre without your dave for more than like 20 minutes

EB: haha.

EB: very funny.

EB: just get your ass back here soon.

EB: it's a school night and i need to get to bed at a reasonable hour so i can get up on time.

TG: you still have a bed time?

TG: haha holy shit

TG: thats fucking hilarious

TG: youre seven fucking teen and you still have a bed time

TG: does your dad still tuck you in like a little baby

EB: oh fuck off.

EB: just get back here before i lock you out of my house for being an asshole.

TG: i will come in through a window

TG: dont test me john

TG: i have before

\-- ectoBiologist [EB] ceased pestering turntechGodhead [TG] at 19:45 --

Dave put his phone back in his pocket and gave his wings an experimental flap. They were tired, but he was pretty sure he could get himself back to Jade's house on them. He took off, trying to weave through the dense trees with as much grace as he could muster. The last thing he needed was to crash into a tree like a drunk idiot and break one of his wings.

He glided down, stumbling a little as he landed on the gravel driveway in front of Jade's house. He dusted himself off, before going up and knocking on the front door. He waited a minute, listening to hear if there were any footsteps coming from within the home. There was no response.

He tried knocking again and came up with the same results. Fuck, he forgot that Jake worked on weeknights. Maybe Dirk could come get him?

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering timaeusTestified [TT] at 19:47 --

TG: hey dirk can you come pick me up from jades

TG: we were hanging out with john and some shit happened and it turns out shes a werewolf now

TG: so uh i led her back to her house and into the woods and i have no way of getting back to johns

TG: if you cant thats cool tho

TG: i get that youre busy

TG: ...

TG: ...

TG: ...

TG: dirk?

\-- timaeusTestified [TT] is an idle chum! --

TG: god damn it

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering timaeusTestified [TT] at 19:56 --

Alright, looks like the only way back was through either walking or flying. Walking was tempting, but he knew that it would take more than an hour to get back on foot so he didn't have any other choice.

Dave took flight for the third time that night, his wings aching in protest. He just wanted to get back to John's and finish up their game of Mario Party without Jade, hang out, and then go home when John had to go to bed like a weenie. How he was going to get home, he didn't know. Hopefully by then Dirk would be free.

Dave soared back into town, trying to keep over the roads to catch the updrafts so he wouldn't have to put as much effort into flying. He couldn't help but notice how pretty the city was from the sky, making him wish he had his camera on him to capture the moment. Damn, birds were fucking lucky to be able to look at this all the time. It's a shame they can't appreciate it.

As soon as Dave hit the half of town that John lived in, his wings started giving out on him. He awkwardly flapped his way down towards the ground, each flap taking a gargantuan amount of effort. He managed to half crash/half land on top of a playground playset in a park still a fair distance away from John's house.

He checked himself over, mentally going down the checklist he'd had since childhood. Nothing seemed to be broken, or rather, nothing new seemed to be broken or sprained so he counted that as a win. It definitely could've gone worse.

He was about to climb down the playset when he heard a couple people walking by. He held his breath, waiting for them to pass, but they didn't seem in too much of a rush. About what he assumed was halfway across the sidewalk next to the park, one of the people started yelling at the other one. The yelling went on for a good minute or so before it quieted down and he heard footsteps retreating.

He was about to go down again, when he realized there was another set of footsteps coming towards him. He pressed himself as much as he could against the wall of a covered slide and prayed to whatever higher power may be listening that the person wouldn't notice his shadow. The footsteps passed him and Dave was pretty sure that the person was leaving until he heard the tell-tale squeak of a swing being sat on. He wasn't getting out of this one easily or soon.

He peeked out of the slide, trying to see what direction they were facing and if he had any sort of chance of getting out of there without being noticed. Unfortunately for him, the person was turned towards where he was. He silently groaned and barely stopped himself from hitting his head against the slide. On top of that, he recognized the person, or rather, Alternian who was on the swing. It was Karkat.

Dave wasn't particularly fond of Karkat despite only talking to him a handful of times. Dave found his obsession with godawful romance novels and movies to be really fucking stupid. There was also the fact that Karkat seemed convinced that Dave stole his girlfriend from him back in middle school, which was dumb, but Dave was pretty sure Karkat still held a grudge even though they broke up. He didn't hold a grudge against him about it since he thought the whole thing was dumb as all fuck.  
Dave tried to avoid him as much as possible since conversations with him went south fast. He especially wanted to avoid him now, for more than obvious reasons. All he could do was wait until Karkat left.

Dave got as comfortable as he could, keeping himself out of Karkat's line of sight. He was tempted to check his phone, but the light from would probably draw Karkat's attention. God, he was so bored.

He stared up at the sky, surprised at how well he could see the stars. He thought that the light pollution in the part of town he was in would've been way worse. He quietly shifted his shades up so he could get a better view of the stars. The light around him was dim enough that he could just make out the galaxy.

Dave was suddenly brought out of his stargazing as his phone started to buzz at him. He fumbled to grab his phone out of his pocket, trying to get it to shut up as fast as he could. In his fumbling, he managed to drop his phone down the slide like a clumsy idiot. Stupid fucking claw hands.

In his periphery, he saw Karkat get off the swing to investigate what had happened. Shit. Fuck. So much for not drawing his attention.

Dave went down the slide after his phone and hoped that Karkat wouldn't notice his severely altered body. It was dark enough that his wings could look like a backpack and his hands could look like gloves. Right?

Dave retrieved his phone from the bottom of the slide where it was still buzzing at him. Karkat looked down at him, with an expression of pure confusion on his face. Dave held up a finger to him in the classic 'one second' gesture and he answered his phone.

"Uh hello?" Dave asked. He didn't check the caller id and he felt like kind of an idiot for not doing so.

"Are you okay?" The person on the other end asked frantically. It was Dirk.

"Yeah man. I'm fine, calm your shit." Dave responded.

"Are you sure? You didn't get hurt did you?" Dirk asked, his voice heavy with concern.

"Yeah I'm sure. I would've told you if something was wrong." Dave assured, a little annoyed with how his brother was treating him like a ten year old. "You don't have to go all mama hen on my ass, I can handle myself just fine."

"Okay, if you're sure." Dirk said sounding unsure. "I'm on my way to get you."

"I'm not at Jade's anymore, dude. I figured I could get back to John's on my own, but I ran into a slight speed bump and now I'm in a park somewhere."

"Which park?"  
"Fuck, I dunno." Dave held his phone away from his face for a second. "Hey Karkat, do you know what park this is?"

"What?" Karkat replied, baffled at the sudden question. "How do you not kno-"

"Just answer the question, dude." Dave prompted impatiently.

"It's Centennial Park. It's right by where the old movie theater used to be." Karkat answered. "What the fuck's going on? What happened to your-?"

"Sush." Dave said, putting his phone back up to his ear. "It's called Centennial Park, it's by where a movie theater used to be. Do you know where that is?"

"Yeah, Jake and I used to go on dates to that place when it was still open." Dirk replied. "I'll be there in thirty minutes. Stay there."

"Alright dude. See ya then." Dave responded, hanging up his phone. "Okay sorry about that, what were you saying, Karkat?"

"What the fuck happened to you?" Karkat asked, sounding a bit bewildered.

"Huh? Oh yeah, this shit?" Dave said, gesturing to his entire torso. "Haha yeah, that's a funny story. Sorry dude, but only tier five friends get to hear that story and at best you're an acquaintance and a shitty one at that. The most I can tell you is that the story is fuckin wild."

"Is this why you haven't been at school?" Karkat asked, sounding unamused with Dave's bullshit.

"Why do you care?" Dave replied, caught off guard by his question.

"Terezi and Kanaya won't shut up about you and your sister's absence and it's starting to get on my fucking nerves." Karkat answered. "Terezi has been insistent that you died, but she does that every time you're gone so it's a little hard to believe. Anyways, I don't actually care that much about your pathetic story. I just want to know what's going on with your stupid body."

"Oh, I'm part bird now." Dave responded. "I thought that was kinda obvious. Like seriously you see a dude with a giant pair of wings and you don't pick up on that? I thought trolls had better night vision than humans, guess I was wrong."

"Jesus fucking Christ, you're still an insufferable prick." Karkat muttered. "And yeah, it's pretty goddamn obvious that you're part bird now. I was just making sure that I wasn't going fucking crazy."

"Fair." Dave shrugged. "I'd prolly think I was tripping balls too if I saw a dude lookin like this in the middle of the night."

"How did this even happen to you?" Karkat asked.

"Dude I just told you that we're not close enough for you to unlock that story. You could barely be considered a tier one friend and that's if I'm being generous."

"Why the fuck do I have to be super close to you to get this stupid fucking story out of you? It's just an explanation."

"Nah man, it's way more than an explanation. There's backstory to it and you've gotta have a basic understanding of me as a person and the struggles I go through on a day to day basis. If you can work yourself up to that point you might get that story and my tragic origin story. A total bargain if you ask me."

"Ugh, fuck off."

"That doesn't sound like something a friend would say."

"I'm going to break your wings off and choke you to death with them."

"That really doesn't sound like something a friend would say. You've gotta try a little harder than that to be my friend. Arrange a playdate or something, like we're three year olds again."

"I'm not going on a playdate with you for a dumb fucking story." Karkat snapped. "I don't even care that much about it."

"Wow, rude. My stories are hella interesting and a friendship with me is a goddamn treasure."

"Doubtful."

"Fuck you."

"Fuck you!"

"You wish." Dave laughed sharply.

"As if. You couldn't pay me a million dollars to get anywhere near your putrid ass."

"As if I'd let you put your weird dick anywhere near my ass."

"Why? Because you're not gay?"

"I mean partially that, but that part is probably about the size of your stubby little horns. I just don't want anything to do with your stupid tentacle hentai genetalia or your obtuse fucking face."

"Oh wow, you sure got me. You burned me so good." Karkat mocked. "Real fucking creative, dipshit."

"As if you could do better." Dave hadn't been putting too much effort into his burns. He'd never tell Karkat that, though.

"I can and I will."

"Prove it." Dave answered. He'd be lying if he said he wasn't at least a little curious.

"You're the crusty shitstain on the inside of-"

"I like where you're going with that, but it's half past I don't give a fuck o clock. So, sorry dude. You'll have to put a pin in that one." Nah, never mind. It wasn't that interesting.

"Why the hell did you ask me to prove that I could burn you better if you were just going to cut me off, asslicker?"

Dave simply shrugged in response. "For fun, I guess."

"I will rip your teeth out and feed them to my Lusus as a light snack."

"You're so violent." Dave said, rolling his eyes.

"I'm really not."

"Haha, yeah." Dave laughed. "Didn't you get punched like once and you started crying?"

"I was in the sixth grade, shut up." Karkat growled. He looked a little embarrassed.

"Fuck, sorry dude." Dave apologized, kind of feeling bad. Sixth grade was hard on everyone, he shouldn't judge too hard no matter how much of a pussy he thought Karkat was at the time. "Didn't mean to bring up bad memories."

"Fuck you, yes you did!" Karkat hissed.

"Nah dude, I wasn't thinking about it. I'm like, actually kinda sorry for that."

"Wow the ice cold dick has feelings now. Be careful, don't strain yourself there." Karkat said, sarcasm dripping from his voice.

"Aww come on dude, I was being genuine." Kinda.

"I don't think I can trust that."

"Nah dude, really. I'm sorry." Dave apologized, feeling maybe a bit worse about what he said. Bringing up someone's past was kind of a low blow. "I'm sorry for bringing that up, dude."

"I..." Karkat seemed at a loss for words. "You actually mean it?"

"Yeah man." Dave answered. "I'm not bullshiting you or anything, this is a straight up genuine apology."

"Fuck uh... Thanks? I think?" Karkat replied.

"Did I mess you up too bad, dude?" Dave asked. Karkat seemed a little fucked up from the apology. Damn, he didn't think he was enough of an asshole to warrant this kind of response.

"No, I'm fine." Karkat said, brushing him off. "You just caught me off guard there."

"Am I really that much of an asshole?"

"Yes, but it's not that, actually." Karkat admitted.

"Then what is it?" Dave asked, curious.

"Sorry, but I can't tell you that." Karkat answered with a sharp laugh. "You're not a high enough tier of friend for that, yet."

"Yet. Are you implying that you're considering a friendship with me? I'm so flattered!" Dave gasped. "You would still want to be my friend even after all we went through in the past five minutes?"

"Don't make me take back my consideration. I'm already regretting considering this at all." Karkat said.

"Why the sudden change of heart?" Dave pried.

"Because somewhere underneath all those layers of douchebag you're secretly a half decent person, I guess." Karkat shrugged. "I could be wrong, though and I wouldn't be surprised if I was."

"Oh come on, dude. I'm more than half decent. I'd say I'm about three fourths decent most of the time."

"I'm regretting everything I just said. I take it back, I don't want to try to be your friend. Fuck off and die."

"Nope, you can't get rid of me now. We're fucking entrenched in this bitch called friendship."

"Shut up. Oh my God." Karkat said, annoyed. Dave was pretty sure that was his constant state of being.

"Nah." Dave laughed. "Okay, but if you really wanna be my friend you've gotta unblock me on Pesterchum or Trollian or whatever you use now."

"I still have you blocked?" Karkat sounded confused. "I thought I unblocked you like a year ago?"

"I don't think you did." Dave replied, checking his phone. Nope, he was still blocked.

"Why did I even block you in the first place?" Karkat asked, seeming perplexed.

"I dunno, I think it's because you didn't like me stealing your "girlfriend" or whatever." Dave said, putting air quotes around girlfriend. "She wasn't even your girlfriend."

"We were..." Karkat trailed off, looking for the right words. "It was complicated. I thought we were dating and she didn't. I pretty much made a huge asshole out of myself like I always fucking do. God, I'm sorry I was such an idiot when I was 13."

"You're good, man." Dave laughed. "I wasn't that great of a guy either. No one was that great at 13." Karkat was probably right when he said he shouldn't date Terezi when they were in middle school, but he would never tell him that.

"Yeah." Karkat agreed. He looked like he wanted to say something else, but he stopped himself. Dave didn't care enough to pry.

A car pulled up alongside the curb of the park, drawing both of their attentions. It was parked on the wrong side of the road. Dave felt his phone buzz.

\-- timaeusTestified [TT] began pestering turntechGodhead [TG] at 20:35 --

TT: I got here faster than expected.

TT: Please get in the car, I'm on the wrong side of the road and I can't afford another ticket.

TG: okay one sec

TT: Don't one sec me.

TT: Get your ass in here.

TT: Oh God, I sound like Jane don't I?

TG: a little

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering timaeusTestified [TT] at 20:35 --

"Hey so I've gotta bounce." Dave said, motioning towards Dirk's car. "Do you need a ride or something?"

"No, I'm fine. I don't mind walking." Karkat replied.

"You sure dude?" Dave asked. "It's not a problem."

"I'm sure. Just fuck off and get out of here so I can start walking back to my hive before I catch a cold." Karkat snapped with little venom in his voice.

"Damn, no need to get snappy." Dave chuckled. "But alright, dude. I'll see you around, but probably not since I haven't been getting out much."

"Bye." Karkat replied. Dave assumed he was waving, but he wasn't too sure since his back was turned to him. He might be flipping him off. The possibilities were endless.

"Hey." Dave greeted, sliding into Dirk's car.

"Who was that?" Dirk asked, pulling out into the road and getting onto the side he should be on.

"Damn, you're not gonna say 'hey' or anything? Rude." Dave responded, faking offense.

"Hey, Dave." Dirk said, deadpan. "Who was that?"

"A guy I know from school. He's kind of a douche, but he's kinda chiller now I guess?"

"Would I know him?" Dirk asked, taking a turn way too wide for Dave's comfort.

"I dunno. His name's Karkat. He's in my grade." Dave answered, subtly gripping the seat for dear life. Dirk could be such a reckless driver sometimes and it made him fear for his life most of the time.

"The name rings a bell." Dirk admitted. "Didn't you have some beef with him a while ago?"

"Yeah, he hated me because I stole his fake girlfriend in middle school."

"Fake?"

"They weren't actually dating, Karkat just thought they were. It was dumb."

"Middle schoolers are dumb."

"Haha, true."

"So, you said he's better now?"

"Yeah, he seems to have chilled the fuck out and become a way more mature dude over the past few years."

"That's good." Dirk nodded, driving past a stop sign. "Fuck, was that a stop sign?"

"Yeah." Dave wondered how any of his siblings had their licenses. None of them could drive for shit.

"Fuck. Don't tell Jane, she'd kill me if she found out I wasn't obeying basic traffic laws with you in the car."

"Okay." Dave shrugged. He wasn't going to anyways.

A few minutes later, Dirk pulled up outside of John's house.

"Hey, do you mind if I come in too? I want to say hi to Jane, it's been a while since I've been over to see her and I miss her." Dirk asked, a bit sheepish.

"I don't see how I could stop you from doing that." Dave pointed out. "It's not my house, dude."

"Yeah, haha..." Dirk looked nervous, making Dave wonder how long it had been since he'd seen Jane. He didn't want to pry since that was an assured way to get him to shut down. He figured Jane would flip her shit if she hadn't seen him in long enough, so that would probably be a good indicator.

They got of the car and walked through the front door, not bothering to knock. He knew John didn't care that much about the societal norm that was knocking which is why he never did when he went over. Not that he ever knocked anyways.

"I'm back!" Dave called, causing John to jump in surprise. "I brought Dirk with me this time."

"Hey Dave. Hey, Dirk." John waved at them. "Dirk, do you wanna join us in playing Mario Party? We lost a player since Jade went all werewolf on us."

"Uh sure." Dirk agreed. "I'm gonna say hey to Jane real quick and then I'll join ya'll, okay?"

"Sounds good." John gave him a thumbs up. Dave went over and sat down on the couch next to his best friend.

"Sorry I was gone so long, my wings gave out on me when I was like halfway to your house and I got stuck in a park for a half an hour." Dave explained, relaxing into the couch. Maybe it was just the exhaustion talking, but the couch was really fucking comfortable. God, he couldn't wait to get home and go to sleep. He was so tired.

"It's cool." John assured. "It happens. Do you wanna play some more right now? A new round just started and Jade was at the end of the order."

"Sure man, let's go." Dave replied, reaching for the remote he'd hastily discarded on the floor.

Over the game, Dave could hear Jane lecturing Dirk. Well, guess that answers that question then. Dave could understand why Dirk didn't talk to anyone much recently, considering the fact he'd taken on a second job so he could start saving up to move out, but it still blew his mind that he didn't talk to his friends more.

Dirk emerged from the kitchen, looking rather abashed. Jane followed behind him, gently patting him on the back to get him to get out of her way so she could sit down. Dirk sat down on the floor where Dave had been sitting earlier.

"Okay, where's my remote?" Dirk asked, searching his general area, but not looking that hard.

"It's somewhere near the chair, I dunno where Jade put it." John said, gesturing to the general area of where she was. Jane reached down and picked it up off the floor, handing it over to Dirk. The remote had small indents in the sides from where Jade had dug her freshly grown claws into it. Dirk said nothing about its condition and played through his turn.

They played through the remaining turns, getting way more into the game than they should've. John ended up winning by two unfairly earned bonus stars at the end. Dave bitched about how unfair it was, earning a pillow to the face from John.

"Okay, but for real we should prolly get going." Dave said, standing up and stretching.

"Ugh, yeah." John replied, frowning. "I wish you guys could stay longer, but my Dad doesn't like me having people over on a school night and you look like you're about to pass out."

"What, no I'm not. I'm hella awake, shut up." Dave replied, yawning.

"Oh shut up, dude. Go home and get some rest." John laughed, lightly bumping Dave.

"Noooo." Dave whined.

"Weren't you just saying that you should leave?"

"Shut uuup." Dave groaned.

"John's right, Dave. We should probably head out now. I have to get up for school tomorrow and so do they." Dirk said, gesturing to Jane and John.

"Yeah, yeah, I know." Dave grumbled. "That's why I said it in the first place."

After a couple goodbyes and some gentle lecturing from Jane for Dirk, the two were finally on their way home. Dave felt pretty fucking ridiculous for being so tired at 9 PM, as he rarely went to be earlier than midnight. He hated how exhausted flying had made him, despite his surprise at being able to pull off such a feat on such short notice. He supposed it made some sense. Birds did learn to fly awfully quickly and he guessed he was no exception to that. At least, he was pretty sure that's how birds worked.

They arrived home after a mostly quiet drive. Dave was too tired to speak more than a few words at a time and he thought it was dumb that he couldn't. He hated being this tired. Fuck the way the human body works.

His Mom was exactly where he left her on the couch, but someone, who was probably Roxy, had draped a blanket over her sleeping form. She was snoring loudly as she always did when she was drunk, which was to say pretty much every time she slept.

Dirk didn't look even the least bit surprised at seeing their Mom on the couch, but he never seemed surprised with their mother's erratic coming and goings. He looked more annoyed with her being home than anything. Dirk wasn't even remotely fond of her and found being around her was irratating. A feeling that was mutual for all four of them, really.

"Are you going to bed?" Dirk mumbled as Dave was just about to go up to his room.

"Yeah man, why? Do you need something?" Dave whispered back. It wasn't like they needed to be quiet, a bomb could go off and it wouldn't wake their mother's drunken snoozing, but habit kept their voices down.

"Nah, I was just checking." Dirk responded. "Have a good sleep, Dave."

"Thanks, you too." Dave replied.

"Eh, maybe. I don't know if I'll get any sleep tonight. I've got an essay to write that I haven't had time to do that's due tomorrow. I promise you I'll get some sleep tomorrow night since I don't have work then." Dirk said, gently patting Dave's shoulder. "I love you, bro."

"Love you too." Dave answered, feeling incredibly awkward about openly showing affection towards his brother.

Dave silently made his way up to his room, barely managing to toe off his shoes before collapsing face first onto his bed. He set his shades on his desk and plugged his phone in, taking care to set it face down so he wouldn't get woken up in the middle of the night by his phone screen lighting up and scaring the shit out of him.

As soon as his head hit the pillow, he was asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry this took so long my life has been absolute hell recently and getting up the motivation to edit this was really hard  
> idk when the next chapter will be out but itll hopefully be soonish  
> happy holidays i hope these 10000ish words make up for my absence

**Author's Note:**

> i hope you enjoy this  
> ive been working on this fic for about half a month at this point and ill be posting the next few chapters as soon as i finish editing them


End file.
